This was originally about a girl I once knew and her love of balloons. Then I changed it completely.
A man stands on the edge of a wide ravine. By his left foot is small stone carving; a representation of a long forgotten goddess.
In his right trouser pocket are three sachets of mayonnaise he has recently stolen from a road side café. One of them is mayonnaise light, the other two are full fat.
The man wears a monocle and a broad grin rests upon his face.
On the other side of the canyon in precisely the same coordinates stands a boy. The boy has only one ear and carries a scar on his knee in the shape of a horsefly. When the boy raises his right hand the smile on the mans face immediately drops. When he drops his arm, so raises the smile.
Approximately 17 inches behind the boy is a half eaten portion of beef Wellington. The boy is painfully aware of the presence of the food yet dare not indicate so, lest the man across the ravine become aware.
The time is 4 minutes to three in the afternoon. At 2 minutes to three both man and boy will begin to laugh. At one minute to three the laugher will become tears. At three o’clock precisely they will both step forward and plunge to their deaths on the merciless rocks below.
What does all this mean?....
Buggered if I know.
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Written by Phil (6738 comments posted) 7th August 2007 |
Nor I.
Bit at a loss to be honest. Might revisit after several more glasses.
Phil |
Written by Seagull (174 comments posted) 7th August 2007 |
I think I saw this once on MPFC!
Cheers
Chris |
Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3369 comments posted) 7th August 2007 |
So this is what you get up to when my back is turned. Did your mother put you up to this? You promised you’d write but when you lied about gravity I had my doubts and now this. I’m guessing it’s one of those lateral thinking problems. If the boy is E and the man is C and if E=MC2 then the man must be called Gerald and it’s the boy who get buggered. No? Oh well it must be one of those buddist paradoxes about one hand clapping or something like that. OK give me a clue
Don’t be a stranger
Jane
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Written by Phil (6738 comments posted) 8th August 2007 |
Several glasses and a good sleep later....
My ignorance flows over.
Phil |
Written by coosh (868 comments posted) 8th August 2007 |
| Ah, that old chestnut – 1970’s A-level question on mayonnaise-related suicide near fjords. Updated to include Fathers for Justice. If you can find a carbon emissions angle, I think the Government will give you a grant for this. Certainly notable for its absence of animal faeces. Good to see your reappearance. |
WAHEY!
Written by givitsum (651 comments posted) 9th August 2007 |
Now then, now then. Then now, Now then!
How you doin' Sas? Been popping me head round the door a bit mesen lately. Glad you're penchant for inane codswallop hasn't deserted you. Top notch, mucker.
Givitsumore. |
speckeld jim
Written by sasquatch (125 comments posted) 9th August 2007 |
thanks guys. i had my doubts about this one, but thankfully they were all justified.
in retrospect i should have made all the mayonaise sachets full fat. |
Written by jimbo (83 comments posted) 19th August 2007 |
Maybe if the man had three sachets of mayonnaise light he wouldn't have fallen when he stepped from the edge of the ravine but instead could have walked clear across and had the beef Wellington all to himself.
Unless, of course, it was a Tuesday?
Cheers! |
Written by sasquatch (125 comments posted) 19th August 2007 |
hi jimbo,
yes had but it been a tuesday, perhaps both their lives could have been spared and there could have been beef wellington for all.
But at least it wasnt raining; jesus christ! imagine the ramifications of that!!
Sasquatch |
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