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Poetry
The Flower Stalk-er
By Snodlander
15 August 2007
The contest said, 'if you were a flower, what sort would you be?'

I have a feeling this is another competition I'm going to lose.

You ask me which name plant I’d be

When growing old in life’s estate.

To compliment your rose beauty,

To be your endless rose-bed-mate.

 

A bind weed, I, as clockwise turn

I’d wrap myself around your stem.

I’d follow not the sun’s harsh burn

But your love, shining as a gem.

 

My flower, white and simple hued,

Is nothing next to your sweet looks.

I am forgot as soon I’m viewed,

Your beauty traps worse than your hooks.

 

Your thorns are hooked and wicked cruel.

They rip and tear when I get near.

But to my love they are the fuel;

My love, my hate, my joy, my fear.

 

I’d hide your blooms ‘neath broad-leafed shade

Lest wanton bees attracted were.

Your sanctum they could not invade

For all, save me, I would deter.

 

I’d bend you down with all my weight

Lest, heaven tall, you’d me outgrow;

Lest you, our love, would desecrate;

Lest you, your blush, to others show.

 

If aught grew near I’d choke them down.

In coils of hate they’d turn death brown.

And when in my love you would drown,

In coils of love we’d compost down.

Reviews
Technicaly...
Written by patterjack (1201 comments posted) 15th August 2007
... I would argue with a lot of points . There is a cod element in some of the language too 
 
But the basic conceit makes its point well , in fun way 
 
patterjack
Yes Snodders
Written by Talisker (1326 comments posted) 15th August 2007
There is a bindweedy quality to this poem - lots of verbal contortions, peppered with horticultural metaphors.  
 
Nice formating, I think.  
 
Lets face it Snod, you may be even worse at poetry than me, but at least you don't pretend to actually be a poet. You are much stronger in the prose environment, but you know that, old man. 
 
I enjoyed reading this though - who else would dare to use 'neath, lest, aught - it may well win - stranger things have happened. 
 
Oli :grin
And who else
Written by Talisker (1326 comments posted) 15th August 2007
Would get 2 reviews from 5 reads? 
 
You are a veritable celebrity Snodders! Next in the Big Brother House methinks 
 
Oli 
 
:p
Now -
Written by audrie (451 comments posted) 18th August 2007
I shall feel guilty every time I curse the bindweed and pull it out. I shall have to remind myself that it is in love!

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