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Poetry
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Night School
By audrie
05 October 2007

Thought you might want a smutty laugh!


He came in the door with his dark gold curls
and she gazed at his eyes of blue.
'What have you got for me today,
quick now, tell me do.'

He said, 'You'll never believe 'til you see
what I have got for you.'
She looked to see what he had in his hands
and her eyes popped out of her head.

She'd never seen one that size before
and she flopped right back on the bed.
He said, 'You'll have to help me, dear,
it's a bit too big you see.'

She gasped, 'Don't worry about a thing,
it's not too big for me.'
Between them they managed to get the thing up
and both were filled with delight.

In fact it pleased them both so much,
they kept it there all night.
When morning came, as mornings do
he said, 'Are you satisfied?'

She said, 'My God! I should think that I am,
you must be filled with pride.'
He smiled and said, 'When I was a child
my Mother encouraged me,

'So she can take some credit for the size of this
you see, She always liked to see me whittle
when I was just a lad, even though it caused some strife
twixt her and my old Dad.'

'But help me get it out of the room
I can't stay here all day.
We'll have to take it lengthways,
there is no other way.'

She gently took the bulbous end
and carried it through the door.
He followed her into the hallway
some six feet back, or more.

'I can't wait to get it up again,'
she cried, 'Just like we planned.
It was worth all those hours at night school
To get such a beautifully carved hat stand!'
 


Reviews

Written by tpowell (105 comments posted) 4th October 2007
Very funny and just a little rude! 
 
Wonder what his wife got up to while he was at night school! 
 
Tracey
cheeky
Written by fellpony (2846 comments posted) 5th October 2007
Well, if you can't have High Poetry on National Poetry day, why not something smutty and funny? Nice one Audrie, I can see that you, Phil, I and Ian H could be a set of comedy stand-ups, if you'll pardon the expression :)

Written by maipenrai (1005 comments posted) 5th October 2007
:) :)  
good un 
Bernie
You mean
Written by audrie (475 comments posted) 5th October 2007
'The GW Four' grandstanding tour? When do we start?? 
 
Thanks to all! 
 
audrie

Written by Phil (8698 comments posted) 6th October 2007
:grin Enjoyed this Audrie. :grin  
 
Phil
Yes
Written by audrie (475 comments posted) 6th October 2007
Phil, I very much thought you might!!! 
 
Did you notice fellpony's suggestion of stand-ups? 
 
You could play banjo! I have an ancient (1928) one I'd lend you!! 
 
audrie
I
Written by audrie (475 comments posted) 6th October 2007
don't know how that face got in, it should have read (1928).  
 
i'VE BEEN TRYING TO WORK OUT HOW TO GET THE 'FACES ONTO THE TEXT oh hit the caps lock again! Sorry!
Damn me -
Written by audrie (475 comments posted) 6th October 2007
if it hasn't happened again when I hit 8 - of course it hasn't happened this time!  
 
(1928) No back to square one. What did I do???
Ghost in the post!
Written by audrie (475 comments posted) 6th October 2007
It comes out right on the text but when it appears on the review Don Corleone appears! 
 
Anybody know what has happened?

Written by fellpony (2846 comments posted) 7th October 2007
Audrie, you simply combined two characters that the code parser reads as a smiley - ie, the number 8 and the right hand bracket ) - and it comes out as specs like this 8) unless you put a space between like this 8 ) 
 
Probably too boring for a stand up routine!
Thanks,
Written by audrie (475 comments posted) 7th October 2007
fellpony, for the info. 
 
I wondered if it was something like that. 
 
Is there somewhere I can look to find out about the others?

Written by Fledermaus (4146 comments posted) 7th October 2007
Heheh... I already thought it couldn't be... Something else. Or it could still be :roll Don't want to think about it :P

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