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By punchy
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15 October 2007 |
I could lengthen this one but i like the last line, tell me what you think?
I woke up today with a cat on my bed,
Which doesn't sound odd, but my cat is dead.
Now cats can be clever , well one does suppose,
But last night I checked and my windows were closed.
I lay there quite still, well frozen with fear,
And the cat said so clearly, "You're quiet my dear".
I tried to converse but the words couldn't come,
He said "What's up with you, Cat got your tongue?"...
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You have Written by audrie (454 comments posted) 16th October 2007 | got the right name, as that is what this is - punchy! Lovely poem and wonderful last line. Great! | Written by tpowell (105 comments posted) 16th October 2007 | Hi Punchy Another good one - I would have liked a bit more, how did the cat get in? Why could he talk? But I loved the last line. Tracey | Written by punchy (504 comments posted) 17th October 2007 | | Thanks, i was pleased the last line came to me for i had no idea where i was going with this one. Only way it could head was a dream but that may be a little predictable so am open to suggestions? | Written by audrie (454 comments posted) 20th October 2007 | I once had two cats and one of them went off to live with an old blind lady. She was so fond of Tammy that I didn't do anything about it. But Tam used to come back and visit, she'd only gone to the house backing onto mine. I had gone to bed one night, when I felt the cat jump on the bed and tuck in behind my knees, and I said, 'How did you get in here?' thinking it was Jemima, Tammy's sister. I put on the light but there was nothing there and Jemima was fast asleep in the kitchen. I just knew that Tammy was dead. In the morning, I went to see the old lady and her husband said they'd had to put her to sleep as she'd been poisoned by slug pellets. To this day I believe it was Tammy coming to say goodbye. | Audrie Written by punchy (504 comments posted) 20th October 2007 | | oops pressed return. Written by punchy (504 comments posted) 20th October 2007 | | your comment about tammy your cat sent shivers down my spine. | Written by William87 (30 comments posted) 20th November 2007 | Ahhh. I thought this was great And the last line was very funny I thought. I don't think it needs to be longer than this though. Of course you could lengthen it if you want, but I don't think that's necessary, It's great as it is I think. /William |
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