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Poetry
Spine
By Matthiasrising
15 October 2007
Another part of the TGI13 series. If anyone is interested in seeing the series in entirity, message me. I won't post the entire series here, because some parts are too short.

Bent like a snake,

You sit surrounding me,

Permeating my will.

Heart like a river,

Flowing like the Nile,

Feeding the sea above.

I want to crush you,

But I know I’ll drown.

Your cage is a scaffold

Upholding this prison.

But where are the guards,

And where is the fence?

How can I escape freedom

To move, to feel, to think?

Quicksilver goliath:

Monstrous and imposing,

But unable to be grasped.

Freeze-frame this moment;

Break it like a mirror.

Then I can cut you.

Drain the force I feel.

Reviews

Written by Phil (6713 comments posted) 15th October 2007
It's reading pieces like these that make me question my poetry reading ability. I want to say that the ideas in this seem disjointed and unnecessarily opaque - but I always worry I've missed something. Read a few times and I've found the imagery a little odd each time. Also, it seems to skirt around a main idea rather than address it. Could be you intended this.  
 
Phil.

Written by gutterkitty (362 comments posted) 16th October 2007
No I agree with you Phil. The ideas in this are effective in creating image and emotion but they are very disconnected. So while I really like the separate parts I feel it would be more effective if you concentrate on one idea and draw observations from that.
Review
Written by Matthiasrising (32 comments posted) 27th May 2008
It's about the life force residing along your spine and ribs. 
Very simple interpretation thus. Your lifeforce is much bigger than your body. Imagine it as a humanoid shape made out of mercury. If you freeze mercury you can shatter it easily. 
 
The speaker hates life. He wants to take control of this force and break it. Everything up to the middle/end is describing the force.

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