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Poetry
Hu
By Matthiasrising
17 October 2007
This is my latest work. Literally just wrote it.
Tell me what you think and constructively what to improve.
I usually just go with my ideas in writing, so I don't always know where my poems are going or what they really mean. Any ideas on this one.

Jagged shadows on the wall

Cast by the frenetic candle flame.

I’ve been wrestling with it,

This creature I keep inside my den.

Time again to feed the monster.

Eyes wide responding to the indulgence.

Feed the alligator;

Cram the sedatives down the cold throat.

Pace yourself, digging so fast

On a mission to china.

Want to end up in the forbidden city.

It isn’t so sacred anymore.

It’s just communist.

Digging with the bent silver fork;

The only china you can reach is porcelain.

Feed the alligator;

Cram the sedatives down the cold throat.

Pace yourself, digging so fast

On a mission to china.

The only china you’ll reach is the cracked plate.

Slave to the hunger, unrepentant glutton.

Forget the other six; this is your cardinal sin:

This carnal feeding frenzy

Eating you inside.

Feed the damn alligator.

Stuff it in.

I can’t wrestle this giant;

Knocks over the table.

Candle falls by the window drape.

Ignore the fire;

Keep on eating.

Gotta feed the alligator.

Reviews

Written by Fledermaus (3490 comments posted) 17th October 2007
Surely a metaphor, but a bit hard to understand. I guess it's about China's quickly growing hunger for energy? Not very flattering to compare it with an aligator. A dragon would have been nicer. ;)  
Somehow I think they're a bit late, as they can only have the left-overs from the lion and the eagle, who more or less ate the entire world by now.
Response
Written by Matthiasrising (37 comments posted) 17th October 2007
That's an interesting interpretation. I honestly didn't intend it to be about China. That was part of the metaphor. If I was in a political mood at the time, that probably would be true. 
Thank you for reading though!!

Written by Phil (6963 comments posted) 17th October 2007
Parts of this have a good pulse, some reads a little flat. I had a few ideas about meaning, (not China) but couldn't commit to one. 
 
The energy builds to the end and I found myself reading faster and faster. 
 
If I understood the significance of the title, I might be a little closer to settling on meaning. 
 
I liked this, but I do get a little frustrated when I leave a piece uncertain. Not necessarily a crit of your work - it could be me. 
 
Phil.
Response
Written by Matthiasrising (37 comments posted) 17th October 2007
Hu is the pres. of China. Not significant. Unless you really want to go political. Which is fine; I welcome it. I don't write so people get MY meaning. I like hearing what these things mean to other people. 
I chose Hu, because I had just read about him on Wiki and got the idea of the China metaphor from reading it. 
The alligator idea was separate and chosen before the metaphor and title. 
This was all my idea. I'd still like to hear other interpretations and critique. Thanks all!

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