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Poetry
Spirit
By kitten_princess
23 October 2007
University's full of opportunities to drink.

I'm not sure if that's a good thing yet.



a glass had stood before me,
filled to the brim with
crystal liquid,

with two hollow icy cubes,
shrinking to nothing,
slipping away.

I took it up -
                and down.
refill -
       and down.
                     once more -


my senses, by now riddled
with alcoholic holes,
soaked up the spirits
of the night,
the crowd

used them to
                   contort
            twist
                            move the music
that screamed from all the walls,

to any shape, any place,
I was there.

the spirit was, anyway.

Reviews

Written by Phil (6730 comments posted) 24th October 2007
Puts across that slightly drunken feeling pretty well. Unsure about the layout - perhaps the words should do the work - perhaps it's just me. 
 
There is a distance between the reader and the words here. While it is effective in that you were slightly 'disconnected' on this particular evening, it kind of pushes the reader away. Again, possibly just me. 
 
On a slightly different note - drinking is one of the many opportunities university offers. I embrac ed it and lived to tell the tale. 
 
Phil.

Written by Lorien069 (10 comments posted) 24th October 2007
I like the way you've used structure to not only add to the poem but bring across its meaning more. 
 
As for drinking, I don't drink much but it is often worth going with people who do just to make note of their antics. :grin

Written by Fledermaus (3306 comments posted) 24th October 2007
Gosh, got to do that one last time... Going out, drinking too much and remember why it was again that I decided a few years ago not to drink alcohol anymore. 
 
Heheh... Yet it's night like those one remembers best... 
Good poem.

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