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By gutterkitty
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15 November 2007 |
He stole my voice,
plucked it from my throat
like a flower,
fingers pinched into a bird.
My neck clipped to a stunted stalk
hollowed, waiting
to be filled with soil.
When the wind tosses the heads
of the dandelions,
I dream of the bean tin
where he will place the bloom,
wipe yellow petals from the window ledge
and shake my soul into the bin.
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Written by Fledermaus (3492 comments posted) 15th November 2007 | | I can see the analogy with the flower, but what is it all about? | Objectified
Written by patterjack (1435 comments posted) 15th November 2007 | Perhaps refined out of existence ?
But I am bold enough to think I follow it -- and i like it except for the last line and image of stanza one
patterjack |
Written by gutterkitty (362 comments posted) 16th November 2007 | I think that my poetry may be gradually becoming nonsensical
I will try to explain...Basically it is your typical story of a girl suffering at the hands of a man and as a consequence not feeling herself any more. The flower is representative of both her voice and her personality (or soul). The man putting the flower in a tin and then the bin is indicative of how carelessly he dealt with her.
Make sense at all...? | I like it
Written by Goddess (124 comments posted) 16th November 2007 | Hello,
I assume you also use the flower to signify beauty and fragility perhaps? As well as her voice and soul? Needless to say the imagery is beautiful but also rather sad and I love how it entwines well with the story. I love poems that tie in with the soul and to show that she is not only being mishandled physically but deep down as well (tell me if I'm being too far-fetched - I do tend to do this sometimes)
I actually think the last line work well... my interpretation is that this man has no care at all for her soul (or her heart?) and would throw it away like rubbish.
I love the references between her and the flower and her and nature, especially 'bird' and 'clipped' (sounds as though you are also talking about the bird wings being clipped which signifies lack of Freedom?)
All in all a good piece of work 
Hope non of this was too farfetched!
See you around.
Goddess x |
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