The End of the Pier

Now young man this will tell you all you want to know.

I bought this with my first week’s wages, missed a couple of meals so that I could get it. Good for the figure though. Everything I’ve done is in here.

This is the first one, I was only eighteen.

That’s me! The one at the back there. The one with long blonde hair and legs that seem to go on forever. It’s the varicose veins that seem to go on forever now!

I can see you’re surprised!I turned a good few heads in my time!

That was my first job, after I left drama school. Just a part of the crowd scene but it was a start.

I’d never wanted to do anything else, just be on the stage. The trouble was there were so many of us, all wanting fame and to be loved by the audience. You needed something. Something that made you different made you stand out. I must have had it because I began to get jobs.

Look!

Here I am, Charmian in Anthony and Cleopatra. It wasn’t with a big repertory company like the Royal Shakespeare but it got good reviews. This is the cutting. Even mentions my name!

It was after that that I met Richie. Here we are in ‘The Importance of Being Ernest.’ Wasn’t he handsome? I really fell for him and we had a thing going for a while.

Began to think I might leave the stage, settle down and have some kids.

Then Andrea joined the company. ‘The name is pronounced Andraya not Andreea’, she had snootily told me. I think there’s a photo of her somewhere.

Now where is it?

There!

She’s with Richie.

He was Hamlet. She was Ophelia. Rave reviews for that production.

Soon after that they went to Hollywood.

The rest you know.

I continued working on the stage, got some leading roles.

This was my favourite, Abigail in Abigail’s Party even Mike Leigh commented on my interpretation. I wasn’t able to go anywhere without the press following. My name was linked with any number of men; none of them meant anything.

I kept in touch with Richie but SHE put a stop to that!

Eventually my style of acting wasn’t popular any more.

My agent suggested that if I was nicer to the director I might get more parts.

This was when I had a walk on part in Coronation Street. The wig and make up make it difficult to identify me. I could have extended my contract, but the stage always beckoned.

I did get a few more parts in provincial rep.

There! That’s me behind the sofa.

The last thing I did was a Tele ad. You must have seen it. It’s the one about dog food, the one with the Labradoodle. You don’t actually see me, I did the voice over for the granny. They’ve suggested there might be more parts for me.

I’ve just heard from my agent. He’s got me an audition.

It’s to play one of the Ugly Sisters in a Christmas Panto up in the North of England somewhere, a Winter Garden or a theatre on a pier I think.
 

The stage really is my life!