Since the accident his life had changed in so many ways. There had been so many changes to make. The death of his ex-wife had come out of the blue. It had been a car accident. She had died instantly. Friends and family had rallied round. The police and social services had also been fantastic. Having given up his job he now cared for his young daughter full time. It was not something that he could ever have foreseen, not something that he would have felt he was cut out for. But now it was his reality and he loved it. He wouldn’t change it for the world. As he loaded the whites into the washing machine, there was a knock at the door. He wasn’t expecting anyone. It was probably Mrs Drysdale from next door. She seemed to be forever popping in and checking that he was coping. And knocking an industrial sized hole in his coffee supplies. But he enjoyed her company, and she had a kind heart.

When he opened the door he was momentarily stunned. The two uniformed police officers registered first. And then he realised that they were accompanied by two others. A very sombre looking couple. Both dressed very smart and carrying files. Something was not right. He felt it before he thought it; his daughter.

“What’s happened? Is Amy OK? Has something happened to her? Is she hurt?”

“Mr Lewis, Amy is fine. She’s still at nursery”

“Something’s happened.. why are you here?… what’s happened? Tell me..” then it hit him, they knew Amy was at nursery. His anxiety increased.

“Mr Lewis. My name is David White, and this is Margaret Corringham. We both work for the child protection team at Newbridge Social services …” he left the introduction hanging in the air.

“I don’t understand..”

“Can we come in and talk to you in private?”

“Of course.. of course.. I’m sorry…” he shook his head as if to try and clear his head of all superfluous thoughts. In an attempt to re-start something resembling clear thinking. So he could try to compute what was happening. He still didn’t understand. “Can I get you a cup of tea or something?”

“No we’re fine. Can we sit down.?”

“Yes… I’m sorry.. I.. I’m just a little lost at the moment. What has happened?”

“I can understand you are very anxious. This must come as a shock. There is no easy way to say this, but we’re here to investigate certain allegations.”

“Allegations? What allegations?” His anxiety exploded as his stomach churned.

“If you’ll allow me Mr Lewis. We are here to respond to allegations of an inappropriate relationship between an adult and a child…”

“Oh my god! It is Amy! My god, what’s happened?” his head felt woolly and his body felt like it was imploding. “Who touched her? WHO?”

“Mr Lewis, I’m afraid the allegation involves you….”

In that instant he was stunned into silence. The four interlopers seemed to fall out of his visual perspective, as he drew back deep inside his head. Like a piece of snapped elastic. He flushed hot and he cold in an instant, before he felt sick. Sick to the pit of his stomach. He felt winded, as he reached for the side to steady himself.

“We are going to escort you to the police station where we will continue this interview. You are advised that you have the right to legal representation, it may be the right time to call your solicitor.”

He heard nothing as the psychic shockwave continued to ricochet around inside his head..

The interview room smelt of disinfectant. The chair was getting uncomfortable. They had been at it for almost three hours.

“I’m going to ask you again mr Lewis. Please do the right thing and tell the truth. It only when you start telling the truth that we can do what’s best for Amy. If you really love her, as I’m sure you do, you’ll do the right thing….”
He was physically and emotionally tired. They weren’t listening to him. Each new question came in like a sledgehammer. Crushing his sanity.

“Mr Lewis … did you touch your daughter in an inappropriate manner?”

“No no no NO! how many times do I have to repeat myself. Will you just leave me alone. I love my daughter. I couldn’t dream of touching her. I love her. Why are you doing this? Can’t you understand.... I did NOTHING…”

“I don’t believe you…”

“You keep saying ‘I don’t believe you’, and I keep telling you the truth.. you just don’t listen. Speak to Amy. Ask Amy if I ever hurt her. Don’t take my word for it. Ask her for gods sake…”

“Alright mr Lewis I can see that you are having great difficulty here… if you admit to us that you did touch Amy, we can help. We can put you in touch with people. Professionals who can help you….”

“I didn’t fucking touch her!!!”

Finally his solicitor had seen enough.

“That’s it this interview is over…”

“Interview terminated at 15.12pm…”

The solicitor placed a protective arm around his sobbing client.

He was home. It had been four days. Four long, hard days and nights. He had hardly slept. There had been more interviews. Photos. Fingerprints. His flat had been searched. Amy’s clothes had been removed. His bedroom had been rifled. Nothing had been put back. He couldn’t face the neighbours. The phone was off the hook. And then there was a knock at the door. He paused to look out of the window, and saw a sierra and police car. He gently opened the door. In an instant his fatigue and depression evaporated. It was Amy.

“Daddy! Daddy!”

He swept her up into his arms. Tears began to spill over his eyelids and he was weeping before he realised it. Uncontrollable tears of joy. Just then he was pulled back to reality by the intrusion into the moment by the man standing before him..

“Mr Lewis.” The nameless figure stood flanked by two Police officers as he handed over two black polythene bags. One clearly full of clothing, the other toys. “Mr Lewis, I would like to formally notify you that the investigation has been officially suspended..”

“Suspended?” he paused to look at the face behind the voice as he clung tightly to his daughter, “What does that mean..”

“It means what it says. As a result of out initial investigations, it was determined that there wasn’t sufficient evidence to proceed…”

“There was no fucking evidence.. I haven’t done anything…”

“There’s no need for that sort of language Mr Lewis. I’m just here to tell you that if further allegations or more evidence comes to light a decision will be made as to whether we should resume the investigation….”

“Just fuck off and get out of our lives…”

And with that he slammed the door before the man had chance to say another word.

He squeezed his daughter tight to his chest, and she planted a warm kiss on his eyebrow.

“I love you daddy…”

“I love you too baby… so much”

When he reached the front room he pulled the corner of the blind back to see the chastened figure climb into car and pause to file a piece of paperwork. Looking across the street he saw darkness flicker as curtains closed all along the street. By morning the whole street would know Amy had been returned. She still held him close. He’d never held her tighter, and knew, with an aching sadness, that life for both of them would never be the same again.