This poem is very close to my heart as it reflects how I genuinely feel. I'm made to act 'like everybody else' when I don't want to. I want to express myself in a way that not many people would dare to. By all means I did so. But does that make me unwanted? I don't think so. However you have your own views, which I highly respect... so this is ME...
This is ME
Can’t I live my own life
and follow my own star?
Or is that too much to ask for
because it’s going too far?
Individuality is a right
which everyone should possess.
Bold beautiful bright
that’s diversity not evenness.
Unafraid to be different
Unafraid to be me.
Heedless of the whispers
so let me be.
Obligated to be different
obligated to be me.
Life is heavenly madness
I clinch it and never let it free.
Because once it's gone
I can't have it back.
So I tell myself,
follow your heart's desire
and enjoy the ride...
|
Hi
Written by maipenrai (784 comments posted) 24th November 2007 |
Not bad this but I DON'T believe that anyone needs to live or act like others, upto you, have you got the will/guts to be you, upto YOU.
who made you be like others? |
its awkward
Written by Hayfa (22 comments posted) 24th November 2007 |
| its not that easy when you live in an Islamic society, and where pride/reputation is the only important thing... im only 16 and I want to express myself not caring about reputation more than my feelings... you see it was difficult for me to put my feeling of anger into a poem, especially knowing that I cant do anything about it. |
Written by Josie (2844 comments posted) 24th November 2007 |
| I do understand your sentiments because I have taught students from backgrounds the same as your own. They see girls from our culture being free to do exactly the things they want to do. That doesn't mean that our girls are bad in any way. Far from it. Everyone - even I as a grandma - don't want others to tell me how to live my life. I'm lucky because my husband goes along with everything I want to do because he knows it's my decision. A marriage shouldn't mean that you come under someone else's control. As for your poem, I think that four-line stanzas would be better. Easily changed. I also think that the rhythm of your poem is not correct in a few lines. You can see where by the length of the lines usually. You have a good rhythm in this poem, but clap your hands as you read it, as you might with a song. |
Written by Phil (6959 comments posted) 24th November 2007 |
Hayfa, a brave piece and comment. I'm struggling to put into words exactly what I want to say. (Some writer, huh?) I have a son a little older than you and what you have said makes me really sad. I hope that using GW is at least one place where you can be yourself. Much more to say, but unsure how to put it.
Phil. |
Thanks Phil and Josie
Written by Hayfa (22 comments posted) 24th November 2007 |
| GW is the only place where I can be me. I am glad you understood where I am coming from, and Josie, girls from your culture are not bad, but free. Thanks for your comments on the poem. xx |
Written by rui (150 comments posted) 24th November 2007 |
A potent message in this.
Would the word "heedless" be more effective than "heartless"? |
Hayfa
Written by punchy (535 comments posted) 24th November 2007 |
If GW is the only place you can be yourself then bloody well go for it honey , take all the reviews on the chin and let go of all your repressed feelings. I love your poem, There is something about openly expressive poems that really hits the mark, when they just bare your soul and your emotions then as far as I'm concerned they are faultless. It is very liberating just opening up in verse and I believe poetry is a journey we take to find our true self. I'm sounding a bit heavy but I know what I mean  xxx |
Written by Hayfa (22 comments posted) 24th November 2007 |
| I suppose so rui. I'm going to change it..thanks for your suggestion x |
Punchy!
Written by Hayfa (22 comments posted) 24th November 2007 |
| I just love it when you coment! Seriously. Theres this thing about me, I can't write poems without real emotions in them. I don't know why. And yes of course I know what you mean love.... thanks alot, whenever I read back through the comments I receive, and when I come to yours, I just want to write more.... thank you very much, you dont know how much it means to me.... xxx |
Written by Fledermaus (3487 comments posted) 25th November 2007 |
I think the exception to the rule is the West, not the East, and the West only became an exception recently.
Although I think tradition, religion, piety and culture can provide an enormous lot of security and order, too much of them can cause frustration. Funnily enough I notice some people (even educated people with relations in many cultures) may not understand the importance of status and pride.
The positive side of that same coin though is that most 'traditional' societies seem to have much tighter family relationships and security than 'modern' societies.
I don't think many 'modern' Westerners have such strong ties with their relatives as most Asians, Arabs and more 'traditional' Westerners do. |
Fledermaus
Written by Hayfa (22 comments posted) 25th November 2007 |
| I woud say my family is almost a modern one, but strong traditional values are still controlling over. I do respect that, but like you said, too much can be extremely frustrating. |
Written by Livinginanattic (473 comments posted) 25th November 2007 |
This is a very refreshing poem which helps to cut through some of the stereotypical images we get. Anything which sheds light on this subject has got to be worthwhile since Muslim women don't have a very strong voice in the media. I think you could write a whole series of works on this issue and explore how it affects different areas of your life.
Cheers,
Ben |
Written by Hayfa (22 comments posted) 25th November 2007 |
| Funny that, I was thinking about doing it! Thanks Ben |
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