I KNOW AN ‘OLE SHOE
TIED UP AN ‘OLE GEEZER
WOT KEPT HIS SPLINTASSES
LOCK'D UP IN A FREEZER

HIS LACES WERE TATTY
LIKE YESTERDAY'S PATTY
WITH TOES PEEPING THRO'
THE HOLES IN THE SHOE

HIS SOCKS THEY WERE FLOPPY
LIKE SMELLY OLE' TOFFY
AND AS FOR HIS HAIR
SPIKED UP IN THE AIR
REMINDED ME OF
THE GLASTONBURY FAIR

NOW, GLASTONBURY FAIR
MY BUDDY HE SEZ
IS RATHER LIKE WEARING
YOUR HAT ‘NEATH A FEZ

WHAT IS A FEZ?
YOU MAY AS WELL ASK,
A FUNNY OLE' HEADGEAR
BUT NEVER A MASK

SO WHY DO THEY BOTHER?
YOU QUIZZ AS YOU ASK,
TO PUT ON A FEZ
WHEN THEY COULD WEAR A MASK

BECAUSE OF THE HASSLE
(UNLIKE A FEZ)
A MASK HAS NO TASSLE,
MY BUDDY HE SEZ

TO FINISH THIS PASSLE
OF BAD RHYMING STUFF
I'LL SWITCH OFF THE LIGHT NOW
AND DREAM OF TWO KIDDIES

WHO I THINK A LOT OF
WHEN WEARING MY FEZ,
BECAUSE YOU NOW KNOW
WHAT MY BUDDY, HE SEZ.