|
By iliketosmile
|
|
30 December 2007 |
This The Day Story
It was a stark stormy slimy day. It was cold. It was brutish. It was a stupid day. But luckily its potential was not lost. For this particular stupid stark stormy slimy cold brutish day had family, yes a whole family of brutish stupid stark stormy slimy cold days. They had reunions every year which consisted of very boring cold brutish stupid stark stormy slimy activities and boring slimy cold brutish stupid stark stormy small talk. But nevertheless however boring it was it was always the eptitude of the year for these stormy slimy cold brutish stupid stark days.
Now this day. Well like i said, this particular stark stormy slimy cold brutish stupid day had family and they insisted on sending the stark stormy slimy cold brutish stupid day to stark stormy slimy cold stupid day school, it of course, got it in with a scholarship since the day was also brutish (a quality revered in days).
Right so the day which we shall call Melvin was enrolled in a school using a scholarship. Now this day went to school and had a tip top time. There the day played football, rugby, hockey, it tried out for school council, was popular, with both genders if you know what i mean... But sadly the era of the day was running out. Loud high school parties, too much drugs, too much sex, with days melvin didnt even know, no self control, no self respect. It was too much too young... Soon enough the day was a father. This was the straw that broke the camels back.
It was a stark stormy slimy day. It was cold. It was brutish. It was a stupid day. It was but now its gone. |
Interesting Written by zmbbw (22 comments posted) 30th December 2007 | More please. z | Written by Phil (6845 comments posted) 30th December 2007 | Not sure what you were trying to achieve here. Interesting - yes - but also a little bewildering. It may have been fun to write, but that didn't translate to the reading - at least for me. It's good to try different things though. Phil. | ahhh Written by iliketosmile (2 comments posted) 31st December 2007 | i wrote an authors note but that seems to have disappeared... again. And the paragraphs have all gone! =(
i put the authors note in twice an' all... Oh well... Thanks for the reviews... | Written by Phil (6845 comments posted) 31st December 2007 | Hi Smiler. I don't know why the intro has disappeared, but I suspect the reason your paragraphs have disappeared is because you've copied straight from Word. (or similar) For techie reasons I don't understand, the GW editor doesn't like text copied in this way and strips out all the formatting. There are instructions on the editor page about how to do it. I usually copy from Word to Note Pad (not Word Pad) and then from there to the editor. Even then, I sometimes have to manually put a few line breaks in. Hope this helps. Just be grateful you're not posting a script. The formatting issues there are huge. All the best, Phil | Written by fellpony (1659 comments posted) 31st December 2007 | experimental, I assume? The repeated description of the day would be fun in a children's story - so remember the trick and if you write such a thing, see whether it will work there. A day going to day school is also an amusing thought. Other than that, it's confusing because you don't do anything to develop the funny idea. What about a (k)night going to night school? | Written by Fledermaus (3448 comments posted) 3rd January 2008 | Interesting and original. Not much to add to what has already been remarked.  |
Only registered users can rate and write comments. Please login or register. Powered by AkoComment 2.0! |