This bit of nonsense is my first attempt at a "Flash" length piece but it needs some explanation ......

An established author I know (in th US) asked for "Silly Outtakes" of no more than 150 words based on a character in her latest story.............

Vern is a Dragon, who also happens to be a P.I. [Private Investigator]
He is disturbed in a swamp by two 'gung ho' Steve "crikey, crocs!" Unwin types who are larger-than-life "Southern gennelmen " caricatures....

The onject is to write something of a comical nature, which is going to finish up on the cutting room floor. But it HAS to be crazy humour, and no more than 150 words.

Anyone else feel tempted to have a go? PM me if you want more details, or add a contribution on this thread ...........   :)

Vern's Voice

"Aaaahh do declare, that's the las' time Aah swaller th' worm at the bottom o' th' Tequila bottle!" Louis gasped " … bain't no way that dang thang's for real!"

I was well rested, and feeling mellow. I decided to go easy on them: they probably weren't fully responsible for the state they were in ……

"Would you like me to sing a song for you?" I asked, politely. It had to be a century since I'd had an audience: I really needed to know if I still has the "X-Factor" to wow the crowds.

They seemed too shy to answer yes or no, so I chose an ancient melody I'd learnt from one of my Welsh cousins some years previously.

           ♪♪ "Mae hen wlad fy nhadau yn annwyl i mi, ….."♪♪

Welsh mountains, Florida Everglades: maybe not precisely the "Land of My Fathers", but close enough ………