Back to Edinburgh Hill you go Fledermaus, but you'll need to improve on your love song I'm afraid. I'm sure you have come to the right place for some help. There must be lots of writers here who can write a good lyrical love song for you. Forget the mathematics and martial arts though. I don't think they go hand and hand with wooing - or do they? My poem refers to his poem "Are You Going to Edinburgh Hill" below - which is an appeal cast out upon the fortunes of time I think.
Fledermaus sits with harp and lute
Cupid’s arrow he would like to shoot –
His songs of love, girls long to hear –
But when he sings they disappear.
Perhaps his words get in a tangle –
Like mother’s washing in the mangle.
Perhaps a bit more rhyme and beat
Would get the lasses on their feet.
Now has he tried the bagpipes yet?
That’ll get them going, just you bet.
Have they eaten haggis, nicely stewed?
Perhaps this will get them in the mood.
Talking of maths and of martial arts –
Is not the way to win their hearts.
Now who on this website can give him advice?
For this is the year that he casts his love dice.
|
IT'S A LEAP YEAR FLEDERMAUS
Written by Josie (2732 comments posted) 4th January 2008 |
| Ah - Fledermaus: My husband has just reminded me that this is a leap year - so you have until the end of February to get cracking, and then the girls will come flocking with proposals I'm sure. We've got to get the right song for you though, so, fingers crossed, there will be some good songs come forth from the writers on this website - just to help you, you understand. |
Written by Fledermaus (3238 comments posted) 4th January 2008 |
Thank you Josie 
Yet the sort of girls I fall for (and especially the one who moved to Scotland) all have this tomboyish attitude  They are often more interested in the typically masculine stuff (like math and martial arts) than I am. Only wrote her a silly limerick once. The sort of girls I like aren't so romantic I think 
I sometimes wonder if perhaps the roles are reversed when I fall in love: Shouldn't it be the girl that longs for romance and someone to hold her? Somehow those girls seem more interested in dissecting flowers than smelling them... Modern girls I presume... |
Written by Fledermaus (3238 comments posted) 4th January 2008 |
A leap year? As in that there's a 29th of February?  |
Written by Phil (6645 comments posted) 4th January 2008 |
Uncle Phil says - in matters of love - introspection (at least in the early days of a coupling) kills all romance. Let it flow. -So speaks the expert who if he had to re-enter the dating game would die of embarrassment and shyness.
Phil.
|
I want an old fashioned girl
Written by Josie (2732 comments posted) 4th January 2008 |
| I think he needs a love song that explains that he's looking for an old-fashioned girl, who loves the homely arts of cooking, caring for children, mending his socks?? (perhaps not in this day and age) - but someone who is waiting for him with open arms when he returns tired from work. What else do you want Fledermaus? He doesn't want martial arts, but he does want marital arts. He doesn't want a career girl, but a girl who will make him and his children the centre of her career. |
Or perhaps a modern one after all?
Written by Fledermaus (3238 comments posted) 4th January 2008 |
Hi Josie.
What I want I'm not sure about, but whom I fell in love with or became infatuated with I do know, and they're far from old-fashioned housewives: Usually adventurous, competitive girls, which somehow combine beauty and strength. I've compared more than one of them to Lara Croft... Somehow it's not so much chocolate and chick lit that they're passionate about, but rather solving riddles, winning competitions and hunting for prizes...
That's the problem: They look cute and pretty, but their attitudes are more manly than my own. and exactly that's what makes them so attractive (but makes it also hard to live up to their expectations) |
:P
Written by Fledermaus (3238 comments posted) 4th January 2008 |
| Discussing my love life on a creative writing site, LOL Let's focus on the poems again. I like your style and the refferences to Scotland you put into it. |
Fledermaus is Bats!
Written by petetheverse (164 comments posted) 4th January 2008 |
Oh dear, F, you've come in for some brickbatting here, I fear; particularly like the play on words in marital and martial and career, from Josie.
There ain't anyone who can write your love songs for you - perhaps you should go back pre-war and plagiarise a bit of Cole Porter or Irving Berling (song-writers, if you don't already know that!), for it's unlikely that anyone of the current generation will ever have heard many of those.
Love has been around for a lot longer than all of us; so don't linger over an Edinburgh refugee; the heart is where the home is, you know, and you can always warm yourself up with a good inverted cliché if the fires go out!
On a more serious note I carried a flame for one of my first girlfriends for years; saw her many times in the interim, lived with her for a while when I was newly single (for other reasons) 30 years later and suffered the same thing all over again. So stay away from Edinburgh!
PTV |
Josie
Written by audrie (444 comments posted) 4th January 2008 |
I loved this poem.
Fledermaus, unfortunately, you can't choose who you fall for and peer pressure puts an awful lot on young girls to all act the same. Maybe, if you prize open the shell, you'll find the pearl inside.
What's the matter with Dutch girls? |
Written by jillrabbit (57 comments posted) 4th January 2008 |
Great poem, Josie.
I could add
When one is in love one is a fool
So practise now at being cool
Don't look too hard, Fledermaus, dear
Then love's sweet vision will appear
Agony aunty Jill |
Written by Carly (9 comments posted) 4th January 2008 |
Great poem Josie, I enjoyed it alot. To note I have enjoyed the above aftermath for Fledermaus...
However I am Scottish, from Glasow, living in the Midlands now and I really like it here, I would never return to Scotland.
I hope that no one is put off by the Scottish - we are OK you know...lol  |
Only registered users can rate and write comments.
Please login or register.
Previous item
