Great Writing - Home > Poetry > Inviting Voices
READING ROOM
Great Writing - Home
Read and review others' work
Articles on writing
Advice from the community
COMMUNITY
Talk to others in the forums
Events and Competitions
GW News
ABOUT GREAT WRITING
All About Us
Contact Us
WORK AWAITING REVIEW
GW IS...
Great Writing creative writing community is designed to prompt ideas and provide inspiration and motivation within aspiring and amateur authors. Whatever your topic; from love poetry to Doctor Who or Harry Potter fan fiction, Great Writing's online writing group is where you can make new friends and improve your creative writing.
WHO'S ONLINE
We have 2078 guests online and 5 members online
Poetry
Inviting Voices
By Rattle_Spear
01 October 2005
This is dedicated to all my unknown and anonymous female fans of the Universe

My subconscious is playing tricks on my soul
This sensation is on a daily roll
In the distance and silence of the morn
My deep sleep and dreams are torn
Apart by female voices so young
Offering me pleasure, passion and fun
Who is playing all these tantalizing tricks
Or are they just my daily ""wake up"" fix
I will have to go out and investigate
Before the calls of excitement are too late
I must say it is a mortal thrill
I know that I am in demand...still!

Reviews

Written by Missinginaction (37 comments posted) 9th October 2005
I don't think this is as good as your other recent contribution: the rhymes are forced, it's full of cliches and I think you could rewrite it in a more original way with a bit of effort. Sorry, but it doesn't make it for me. Remember these comments are about the writing, not you personally! 
Thanks for the read. 
 
- Missing

   Only registered users can rate and write comments.
   Please login or register.

Powered by AkoComment 2.0!

 Previous item   Next item