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Poetry
I want him back
By Snodlander
10 January 2008
Written for a 'trapped' poetry competition

Harsh lights slice through sleep-filled eyelids, electronics scream.
Burrow under down-filled duvet, make it go away.
But the ruckus won't be silenced, killing peaceful dream.
Ice-cold floor and blunted razor. Welcome to my day.

Cardboard toast and tasteless coffee. News sounds all the same.
Wars in countries no-one's heard of, starving thousands flee.
Adverts selling perfect lifestyles, come and play the game.
Plastic cards for plastic people, wishing it were me.

Same old people on the platform, faces frozen blank.
Day on day we see each other, saying not a word.
Week on week of lonely journeys, just ourselves to thank.
Year on year of silent trudging, lifetimes in the herd.

March the dreary streets of London, look not left nor right.
Automatic pilot steers us to the office door.
Shifting paper without meaning, yearning for the night
When at last we lose our senses, sleep for evermore.

Home that evening, hit the armchair, shout out at the kids.
Microwave and double vodka, mindless TV show.
Counting seconds till my bedtime lets me close my lids.
Thinking of a time remembered when life wasn't slow.

Fresh from college, hale and healthy, full of love's first glow.
Pushing hard against the traces, racing round the track.
Plans to change the huddled masses, break the status quo.
Puzzled where that young man went to. God, I want him back.

Reviews

Written by tartqueen (22 comments posted) 10th January 2008
Thought this was great! Keep up the good work!

Written by audrie (475 comments posted) 10th January 2008
Oh yes, don't we all want our younger selves back again. 
Wonder if we'd make the same mistakes - probably! 
 
Good poem.

Written by njruk (2 comments posted) 10th January 2008
My god but I can empathise with this one! You hit the nail right slap bang on the head. I'm only a recent graduate, but I'm already staring a life like this in the face. Rather scary...
Great.
Written by punchy (576 comments posted) 10th January 2008
Really good. I enjoyed. I hope you won the comp?

Written by maipenrai (1006 comments posted) 11th January 2008
excellent piece of writing. 
Bernie

Written by Josie (4035 comments posted) 11th January 2008
Yes, excellent writing but I do hope that it is not you in the poem. I think sometimes people are justified in sitting down and writing down their aims and objectives in life and then marking the route to them. Trapped as the man in your poem must be hell on earth, and yet many live their lives like that. What a dreadful shame. Like a prison sentence. Retirement is great though. You come through the tunnel and out of the end eventually.

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