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Poetry
The Unfeeling Kiss
By DressedInPoetry
29 January 2008

The music plays softly.

The reverberating notes

Echo across the crowded room,

Cutting into the silence between the couple

At table six, touching their hearts

In a way that nothing else can.

They sit,

Eating their plate of spaghetti

(A subconscious attempt

To reach the happiness seen

In the movie of their childhood,

Lady and the Tramp).

Except unlike in the movies

Their kiss is completely unfeeling,

Devoid of love.

 

They both dance

In their masquerade

Their masks of romance

Hiding their true feelings

(Or rather, their lack of such emotions).

 

Caught in a waltz,

Stepping to the beat

Of Insincerity and Dishonesty,

Twirling around the floor

In shoes filled with Deceit and Corruption,

Spinning with the pretense of love,

The façade of tenderness and passion,

Spiraling

Out of all control.

Reviews
Observation
Written by petetheverse (164 comments posted) 29th January 2008
I, too, enjoy constructing little scenarios while observing others - particularly when there is a little time available, as in a restaurant. 
A little while ago I posted 'The Corner Table', which was written very much on the same theme. 
Perhaps there is too much here - my only slight criticism - is it a little too long? 
Like the metaphor of the shoes filled with ....

Written by katejayne (17 comments posted) 17th February 2008
I agree with the comment above on the metaphor thing, very well written. 
 
I like the message of the poem. 
 
The way two people onto a relationship that's dying, or in this case it seems dead.  
 
I think the bits in brackets, however, makes the writing sound too much like an after-thought. 
 
Good writing though, i'll be reading more of your poetry:)

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