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Poetry
Backstreet Hong Kong
By Steve_K
10 February 2008

This acrid place exists 

Behind the back of my mind

I’ve been there and would rather forget

The greasy streets and unfriendly eyes

Falling slowly to mix my face with the ground

I have been there and tasted the bitter fruit

Contempted into the ladies bar

Riding there my mind

All the while they watch me come

Come further into their pieds-à-terre

I cannot stand and cannot leave it behind

Forgiveness cannot be sewn

I close my eyes and try to forget family and friends

Ride beyond the blurred horizon

The fruit still tainting the back of my tongue 

I’ve forgotten your name

The only woman I’ve ever loved

Their greasy fingers clawing me into their greasy pool

Treading into their wont

I am terrified by my hatred

Riding harder into the night 

I have forgotten you my love

I am gone

Reviews

Written by Fledermaus (3238 comments posted) 10th February 2008
Interesting how different this seems from how I saw HK. But then, I must admit I've only been there one week and only saw the islands and the busy parts of Kowloon. Yet it seemed to me that at least there everything was extremely clean (no chewing gum or dog's droppings in the streets like over here) and the people were mostly very kind and polite... 
 
Sad piece this one...

Written by Phil (6645 comments posted) 10th February 2008
There is a strong, pervasive atmosphere in this. It feels dark, desperate and dangerous - of mind and place.  
 
Contempted threw me. I'm pretty sure it's only used as a noun. Here, you use it as a verb. For me, this swings between poetry and prose but I did find it quite an affecting read. 
 
Phil

Written by francoise (129 comments posted) 10th February 2008
Didn't know where this was going, but I felt drawn enough to continue reading it. I felt the last two sentences gave too much away in terms of the overall sadness of the piece. Maybe something abit more elusive. But that's just my opinion. 
Agree with Phil on everything else. 
p.s was the lack of punctuation deliberate? I felt it needed full stops and a few commas perhaps. 
 
P.S2 my name's Fran btw  
:)

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