Ghost one: Right here they come, are you ready?

Ghost two: nope

Ghost one looks round a look of annoyance on his spectral visage: Youre not going to start again are you?

Ghost two: Start. What?

Ghost one: look you bastard, I don't like this anymore than you do, but the sooner we get this over with the sooner I can get my semi transparent ass out of this dump. And the same goes for you.

Ghost two: don't care.

Ghost one sighs, composes himself and tries a different tactic. He begins again in more diplomatic tones: listen I know its my fault were here. Weve been over this a thousand times, but if we work together we can..

Ghost two: Shut. Up.

Ghost one: why you stinking little shit, I out to smack you one right in the..

Ghost two: in the what barry? In the head? You tried that remember, so did I. I also tried kicking you in the testicles, headbutting you on the nose, and toe punting you right up your unholy backside. it doesn't work does it?!. We have no physical substance. Berk!

Ghost one becoming enraged: JUST...just work with me yeah. We know the deal, we have to scare the shit out of at least 50 people before...

Ghost two interrupts again: yes barry, I understand that, but the point is they CANT SEE US!! how does one 'scare the shit' out of anyone, when one can apprently be neither seen nor heard??!

Ghost one opens his mouth to speak, then gives up, his shoulders sagging in defeat.

At that moment the door opens and three people, an estate agent and two prospective home buyers walk in.

Ghost one jumps up full of hope, he leaps at them screaming a blood curdling cry of wrath and hatred. Waaaarrrrgggghhhhhaaaahhhh

Estate agent: as you can see the hallway is wide and inviting, and the décor is in good condition.

Ghost one tries again, leaping into them: EEEaaarrrrgggggghhhhhhaaaaaaayyyyy

Prospective buyer 1: yes, and the flooring seems to be nice and solid.

Buyer 2: the stairway is gorgeous!

Ghost two sits slouched in the same armchair, staring out the window whilst drumming his fingers on the arm of the chair.

The three people continue into the kitchen.

Ghost one turns to ghost two: I hate you...so much.

Without looking, Ghost two flips him the bird.