She unzipped her boots and tossed them into the corner. The 'date' had taken a lot longer than Yingying had expected, but she had forgotten all about the time while she had given Ken a guided tour of an Amsterdam he did not know. They had ended up in a pub and talked about so many things until he had looked at his watch and told her he really had to go.

The house was dark and empty, yet the spicy smells from the kitchen welcomed her home. Just to make sure, she announced her arrival loudly, but it seemed she was all alone.

Somehow it felt as a relief, for she needed some time to think it all over before she could answer to the cross-examination her parents would most certainly launch. It was well-meant, but Yingying wanted some rest before she would have to reply to the barrage of questions they were used to fire at her on such occasions. It was one of those strange interactions between a youngest child and overly concerned parents...

She walked to the kitchen, turned on a small light and looked at the memos on the kitchen table.

" We are to Auntie. Will be back somewhere tonight", one read, but it was the other one that interested her more.

" Jonah called. Told him you'd call him back."

She sighed. What had happened between the two of them? Somehow she used to feel it when he would call her, but since that incident, it seemed as if something had changed.

The strange, light-hearted happiness that she had felt a minute ago seemed to dissolve in the twilight around her.

Yingying walked to the living room, picked up the horn and dialled his number. She half expected a robotic voice to announce Jonah's absence, but after three beeps, she heard his own voice.

" Yes, hallo?"

" Hi. It's me, Yingying. You called me?"

" O yes, hi. I was just wondering how you were doing. I haven't heard from you for some time."

" I know. I was busy. I'm sorry."

She was not. It had been her decision.

" So how are things? Met any nice guys?"

She looked at her own reflection in the window and for a second, she did not know what to answer. Once she would have told him all about her date, but everything had changed in that very instant a month before.

" No...", she answered.

" Shall we have some tea one of these days? Chat a little? I haven't seen you since my birthday party.

" I'm really busy these days. I don't think I can find some time..."

His birthday party... That was where the link had been broken, or at least, where the break had become visible to her. At first she had not known what had happened, just that Jonah was no longer the same Jonah she thought she knew.

He had been sitting there on the coach together with his friends and they were chatting. Jokingly she had asked one of the boys about Jonah's love life, for "all seemed quiet on that front."

The guy had laughed.

" You know Jonah likes blondes, do you?"

At that, her former soul mate had poked his elbow between his ribs and nodded at her.

" What?", she had asked.

Then he had shrugged and allowed his friend to tell about his short night with a blonde he had met in a cafe.

Yingying had fallen silent and filled her glass with vodka, even though she had resolved not to drink.

At first she had thought it was the story that had shocked her, for she had never expected Jonah to have a one-night-stand, but then she recognized the feeling of jealousy. Jealousy at Jonah, so she thought at first, for he seemed to have so much more success on the field of love...

But then she began to sense it was about something else. It was not about the one-night-stand itself, however unpleasant she felt about it. It was about Jonah telling this to another friend and not to her.

Later that evening he had underlined the alienation even clearer. Both of them had been drinking more than they should have and she had teased him with his many girlfriends, when he had replied in a shattering way.

" I won't tell you everything, Yingying... You are too much of a gossip queen."

She knew he was right. More than once she had been unable to keep her mouth shut. He had hinted her about his displeasure about her indiscreetness before, but somehow she had been deaf for his subtle remarks.

Jonah's telephone voice brought her back to the present.

" A pity. Are you sure you can't find a gap in your diary?"

" No..."

It was done, over... They had been soulmates. He had told her about his life, and similarly had she shared many of her secrets with him. They had never been lovers, but instead established a relationship that seemed to be both worthier and more stable. It was something special, unlike any other friendship. Or so at least Yingying had thought...

It was a soap bubble and she had caused it to burst herself.

" You sound a bit depressed."

" I'm not."

She knew he could sense it rather than hear it, but she shrugged. The illusion was gone and she was ashamed of herself; Not only because she had indeed been a gossip queen, but moreover because she knew she would never allow the break to be mended. She would cherish the scar on her soul and accentuate it to remind herself of her foolishness. She no longer believed in unconditional friendships.

" Are you sure you're alright?"

She felt a tear roll over her cheek and knew that it had been there in her voice. How she longed for someone like the old Jonah, someone she could talk to... But she knew she could not make up with him, not ever...

And then her thoughts drifted away, to Ken. If Jonah had secrets for her, then Ken would be her secret. She would establish something with him beyond anything she ever had with Jonah.

" I am perfectly fine Jonah", she said, " but I've got to go now. Byebye."