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Non-Fiction
A Letter To A Friend
By nsperfect71
08 March 2008

 Hi all,

This is the first time I publish a piece I've written anywhere! I'm understandably excited and scared. That said, don't go soft on me! I want to know my weaknesses and strenghts (if any) through you lot.

I'm not even sure I'm posting in the right category - Mods, feel free to move if necessary. This is a 'letter' that was obviously never intented for the Royal Mail!

 



How eager you are. How fresh. How keen. I still remember the first time I met you; you came across as so gracious, yet sharply quick. It was almost as if you had a neon sign on your forehead glaring out to the world ‘Gifted Person!!’.
 

You very obviously are dying to prove yourself. You are special. And what's more, you suspect as much. 
 

You are raring to go. But where? Will you get there eventually? I think you will. I dearly hope you do. I won’t deny that I am worried you might. People who know where they want to go worry me. People who get there scare me.
I glimpse something in you that I can't describe. I relate to you in an inexpressible way. I identify with you for reasons that remain a mystery. Sometimes I feel that what I see in you is a ghost of myself. Of what I might have been. Or is it of what I would have liked to be? But that's an exaggeration. I don't look up to you. I simply would have liked to be more like you. 
 

I see a hint of my past in your features and hear an echo of my youth in your voice. A sense of déjà vu hits me. Your hopes and your uncertainties are unexpectedly familiar. I would like to keep faith with you and tell you that it will turn out all right…but who am I to know? And what does ‘all right’ mean?

You intrigue me. You impress and stimulate me. For years I lived on Planet Ordinary where I met people too uninspiring to be compared with you. I know it is harsh to portray them in that light. They're kind and welcoming friends. They can be fun in their own way. But they are completely happy to shuffle along from day to day dragging their feet in the mundane.

And then you came along.

A pebble thrown into a sleeping pond. You are a cut above the rest. That's not to say that you are better than the rest. And you are happy to mix in with everyone else, no matter how humdrum. Is it again your desire to prove yourself? That you can have it all? That you can fit in with all? 
 

You are truly something else. A breath of fresh air. I feel lucky that someone like you is in my very own circle. Does this make me sound sad?

Above all, I feel proud of you. 
 

I like to think that I’m not just saying that so some of your future glory rubs on me.

I like to think it is not a defence mechanism to stop Jealousy from eating away at me.
 

I like to think that deep down inside, beneath the envy and the insecurity, beneath the doubts and the regrets and the grief over the lost chances, it is pride that swells up inside me when I think of you.
  

Reviews

Written by FlightlessWings (5 comments posted) 8th March 2008
Wow, thats kind of intense in its own way. I realy liked it! Major Coodles!

Written by fellpony (1617 comments posted) 9th March 2008
I'd be very happy to receive such a letter!  
 
Hard to think which section it belongs in, really - I suppose if this is a real letter to someone who is real, then non fiction is as good as anywhere else to post it. After all, it's not the label that matters but having someone react to your work - just occasionally you'll get a better response in another section. 
 
PS - flightlesswings - who is Major Coodles? Is he related to General Kudos?

Written by nsperfect71 (44 comments posted) 9th March 2008
Thanks for your reviews guys. 
 
Fellpony, this is adressed to a real person but I would never dream of showing it to them!
Really liked it...
Written by mia_ms_kim (1019 comments posted) 9th March 2008
I think it is human nature to want to take a peek at other people's personal letters, because we want to know what's is really hidden beneath the surface. I found this revealing, honest and vulnerable, the best way to communiate, in my opinion. 
 
After reading this, I was less interested in the receipient of this letter, but very intrigued by the mind of the writer. 
 
I thought the letter was slightly patronising, but since you are writing to a younger person, maybe it is ok.  
 
I found some expression awkward, eg.  
'sharply quick' (perhaps 'sharp, quick' is better?) 
 
'a neon sign on your forehead glaring' ('glaring' gives a negative aggressive impression to me.) 
 
'You intrigue me. You impress and stimulate me.' (piling up of verbs here sounds awkward to me, perhaps replace the second sentence with a metaphor or a simile to explain how you are intrigued?) 
 
Anyway, above is my two cents worth. 
Happy writing. 
 
Mia
Thanks Mia
Written by nsperfect71 (44 comments posted) 9th March 2008
...for a really helpful feedback.

Written by Josie (2787 comments posted) 20th April 2008
Oh - mia has said so much that I would have said anyway. You write this in such an interesting way, and what a novel way to meet someone face to face - through a letter. It was my wish to know more and more about this person, because it felt like a jigsaw puzzle in my mind: Is it a young person, an older one, just a friend? Only two little things: 2 question marks missing right at the beginning. Easily fixed. Really well done. I enjoyed your work.

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