Just a bit of nonsense.
A Tuscan Maid
I once loved a Tuscan maid
Plain of face, though kind and fair.
Both her ears were shaped like gnocchi
And fusilli hung for hair.
Chianti prompted me to announce
That her arms were as thin as linguini,
An extrovert, she lifted her skirt,
"And my legs flat like fettuccini."
She cracked in one of her delicate plates
A cannelloni metatarsal,
So I rubbed passata on to her chest
And found two ravioli parcels.
As I take up my penne to write
I wonder why I never asked her
To marry me, but as you see
Her finest days were pasta.
|
Written by andybyers (171 comments posted) 28th March 2008 |
So this is what you do with your time now that The Sopranos is a wrap. 
This is enviably clever, and fun to read. |
Written by Phil (6713 comments posted) 28th March 2008 |
Fun piece. That last pun is awful, but still funny.
Really enjoyed.
Phil |
Written by Veronica_Milvus (626 comments posted) 28th March 2008 |
ooowwwww!!!
I didn't see that last line coming!
very good, you should be on that "28 acts in 28 minutes" comedy show on Radio 4.
V |
Written by Fledermaus (3281 comments posted) 28th March 2008 |
| Depends on how you look at her how attractive she seems... Surrealistic. |
Written by Fledermaus (3281 comments posted) 28th March 2008 |
| Depends on how you look at her how attractive she seems... Surrealistic. |
Written by punchy (500 comments posted) 28th March 2008 |
| Very funny and clever x |
Written by Brett (782 comments posted) 28th March 2008 |
Thank you, Andy - I do like The Sopranos funnily enough.
Phil, I agree. The pun is awful, so awful that I could not resist - to tell the truth the whole lame piece was written around that pun. Sad eh?
Thank you V, I don't know the show, but shall rectify the matter.
Fledermaus - she wasn't as attractive as she sounds. If she had been I would have sprinkled her over with parmesan.
Punchy, that's praise indeed from one who regularly makes me giggle. Thank you. |
Molto Divertente Brett
Written by Josie (2785 comments posted) 28th March 2008 |
| As they would say in Italy: Basta! Basta! Moto divertente signor! Really funny. Well done Brett! |
Written by NedWilson (26 comments posted) 29th March 2008 |
| Funny and enormously enjoyable! |
Written by alister (3 comments posted) 5th April 2008 |
awesome. this was really, really well written.
maybe the ravioli parcels line is a little weak but i'd say just change the wording and keep the idea because it's great.
i thought you really nailed it rhythmically (and in terms of rhyme too) with the line "an extrovert, she lifted her skirt," that was excellent.
another point i'd correct is the grammar of stanza three. there should be a full stop after metatarsal.
those are pretty minor points though. well done. |
Thanks alister
Written by Brett (782 comments posted) 5th April 2008 |
I did not put a full stop after metatarsal as (in the mood of the piece) this is the reason he finds to rub her chest.
But thank you for your kind words - I shall think about the ravioli line.
Cheers
Brett |
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