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Poetry
Sailing through Byzantium
By Steve_K
21 April 2008

The sky purple, bruised

The Sun hidden neath a far off hill

A ships horn thumping out

The vagrancies of its life

The Turkish delight of doubt


The bridge, a connection of dreams

Dreams that are dreamt

In heavy nights of thought

Thought that may break a back

Too often dreamed, too often sought


Have I grown old in all this time

Have I become an older man

Gleaned or ungleaned skill

Sunken foundations of Adam’s Ale

Or has it been a deadened thrill


And tonight in delicate Istanbul

With the eastern winds and Western views

Have I been reborn in hopeful certainty

While standing in the middle of a market street

The Turkish delight of my own vagrancy



Reviews

Written by mia_ms_kim (973 comments posted) 20th April 2008
I like this. I don't exactly know why. "Have I become an older man" seems to capture the mood of the poem for me. Premature aging from too much experience and freedom??? Hmmm... Reminds me of Shiva Ryu's poem during his wandering days, of the wanderer falling on the road, tired from his freedom... I think this captures something of the spirit of the age for me. Poignant. 
 
Mia :roll

Written by fellpony (1580 comments posted) 20th April 2008
I was teased by the echo in the title of Yeats' "Sailing TO Byzantium" - but yours is a modern civilisation, not Yeats' old one.  
 
There were some ideas I liked - the speaker feeling old and later reborn, for instance, and the "delicate Istanbul / with the eastern winds and the Western views"; some I felt jarred, like "hidden neath a far off hill", and the repeated "Turkish delight". It feels rather as though you write fast, without revising. There's a freshness here, but also an unfinished quality.

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