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Poetry
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Life's Like that
By Robru
08 May 2008

Just a quick look at life, my life without any frills.




            Hello - I am Australian.
            Born nineteen thirty three;
            Three people were there for my coming;
            My mother,the doctor, and me.

            I grew up in dry inland places,
            A long, long way from the seas;
            I learned to love open spaces
            Where I could do as I please.

            My first day at school was a shambles,
            I went home at midday,you see;
            Mom sent me back quite quickly
            'Cause school didn't finish 'till three.

            In class I was a good student;
            At exams, I did very well;
            But when I went out in the schoolyard
            I seemed to come under a spell.

            At sport I was just a number;
            I excelled at nothing at all.
            My knowledge was somewhat restricted,
            But, If an object is round, its a ball.

            I started work when I had to,
            I needed to pay my own way;
            So I worked every day for a long time;
            'Till I learned the word 'No', I could say.
           
            I decided to upgrade my learning;
            Correspondence, they said, was the way.
            So I spent seven years of my spare time
            Learning naught I could use,anyway.

            I did marry a local young lady;
            But too soon we went our own ways;
            Together,we still had five children
            Whose lives never cease to amaze.

            I worked in a country that's backward;
            Or,so the pundits did say;
            But the local people accepted me
            So I had a wonderful stay.

            I went to NZ for a looksee;
            North Island is all that I've seen.
            Fourteen years I lived there,
            There's many nice places I've been.

            Now I'm old - not retired;
            I caretake a property now;
            Fix fences,check water and such like,
            And all for the good of the cows.

            My physical fitness has lessened,
            My stamina's not what it was,
            So I now write lots of poetry,
            The reason is - simply because.

Reviews

Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3138 comments posted) 8th May 2008
You've certainly packed a lot of life into one poem. In fact it seemed too much to fit into the contraints of poetic form. Lines like 
"Till I learned the word 'No', I could say". 
felt a bit awkward,just to fit the structure  
Why not expand it and post it up in non-fiction. You've obviously got a lot to tell.  
cheers 
jane 

Written by Brett (483 comments posted) 8th May 2008
I enjoyed this very much, a long life leading to that beautiful closing line. 
 
I do agree with Jane regarding the line 
"Till I learned the word 'No', I could say" 
 
That does feel a little as if it has been crowbarred in, but this a ting gripe. In my humble opinion if you amend this one line you have yourself a very good piece. 
 
Cheers

Written by Josie (2496 comments posted) 8th May 2008
Robru - You started off very well, but, as interesting as the facts were, I also agree the poem went on too long, and the very good metre that you started off with got lost as if you were also getting a bit fed up with this one and wanted to reach a conclusion a little quickly.  
 
How about this as my contribution: 
 
 
And now I am old but not finished 
For I caretake a property now. 
I fix all my fences, count all my pences, 
And all for the good of the cows. 

Written by mia_ms_kim (891 comments posted) 8th May 2008
The title somehow seems to cast a shade of sadness over the piece. But I think it's an innovative idea to encapture one's life in a nutshell of a poem. I found it very interesting, and loved the way it started, also the way it ended about old age, sort of wistful but content and peaceful. Unless our lives resemble TV soap operas, or even if it is like soap opera, life is really like that, I guess. I think I get it. 
Mia 8)

Written by Robru (125 comments posted) 9th May 2008
Hi Jane, I can't write prose that is any good. I've tried and failed many times. The line 'till I learned the word no, I could say' is out of sinc. It came about when I realised that as a new young worker I only had to work 48 hours a week and not 7 days. I shall have to work on that. 
To brett, yes that line again. Same story as I wrote to Jane. 
To Josie, I must agree that the hetre varies a bit here and there but it seems to tell the story as I wanted, so I will think about it. 
To Mia, life is like that, my life anyway. There is a bit of sadness along the way but I have learned that the world is as perfect as it can be right now. Therefore I accept life as it is and get with making the most of what I have, Now. 
To all four I say thank you for your comments. You have each given me something to think about for future work. I have another long poem in the pipeline, but it may never see the light of day as I have to keep it short enough to be readable. There can only be one"Rhyme of the Ancient Mariner" 
Cheers to you all, Bob

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