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For Children
Maxibeasts - The Monkey and the Whale
By Katanga
09 May 2008

I've re-posted this from the supposedly adult 'Poetry' section of this great website.

Apologies if you've seen it before.

If you haven't, think how children might relate to this bizarre adventure . . .

It all came about (am I boring you?!), due to a genuine scientific question:

"Has a monkey ever touched a whale?" Apparently, it was debated on Radio 4, no less!

Weird and interesting, surely?

And so I tried this strange romance . . .

The rest is up to you !


I know I sound pompous, but seriously, especially if you have kids, give it a go at bed time  .  . .


Any feedback welcome!


Cheers!


Katanga (aka John) X





The Monkey and the Whale

The Monkey was tired of his tree top home
So he travelled far and wide
Searching for a primal dream
And a suitable bride

He set out less than well prepared
And more than a little depressed
He trudged the world despondently
On a failing romantic quest

His journeying took him farther
Than any bird can fly
Until he came to a seaful place
Where he lay down to die

But the birds there took pity
The Seagull and the Dove
And sang to him of ocean tides
Where swam his waiting love

He listened and took notice
Of their romantic harmonies
Roused himself and went in search
Of Love by the lonely seas

When the Monkey met the Whale at last
He knew that he had found
A love beyond the reckoning
Of all the sailors who have drowned

The Whale loved her Monkey
And carried him out to sea
Where they swam and danced and laughed aloud
In perfect harmony

So what of the Owl and the Pussycat
And their beautiful pea-green boat
They’ve got nothing on the Whale and the Monkey
I doubt they’re still afloat

Reviews

Written by Josie (2144 comments posted) 9th May 2008
Good story John. I think. though, that these lines are a bit strange: 
 
A love beyond the reckoning 
Of all the sailors who have drowned 
 
Children, and I, would ask what had love to do with sailors who have drowned? I expect you know, but if children have to ask this question, I think it needs changing myself.  
 
I will tell you the absolute truth, and not wishing to offend you. I think something is quite wrong with the metre when you have, as in the last verse, a third line so very long. I would do a bit of revising - but please don't take offence as none is meant at all. Your story is good.  
None Taken!
Written by Katanga (209 comments posted) 9th May 2008
Josie, thank you! 
 
Yes, you've picked up on the line I am least comfortable with, but I somehow want it to stay. 
 
Explaining it to you (or myself?!) is tricky, let alone to children! 
 
I think I'm trying to suggest that their love is 'massive', greater than the combined love of all the tragic sailors who have yearned for their sweethearts left behind on dry land, only to meet a watery end before they can return and get married and so on.  
 
Does that make any sense? I ponder on . . . 
 
I see what you mean about the penultimate line 'They've got nothing on the Whale and the Monkey'. It is, as you point out, rather syllabically over-packed, and has to be almost 'gabbled' when read aloud. 
 
However, this is partly intentional and I hope leads to a stronger 'resolve' with the straight iambic trimeter (?!) of the last line - 'I doubt they're still afloat' - ti Tum ti Tum ti Tum. Bang bang bang. 
 
I shall keep pondering these points! 
 
Thanks again - Cheers! 
 
John

Written by Aurora (49 comments posted) 9th May 2008
I really liked this and as with many good poems it made me smile at the end! i think children understand a lot and if they do ask questions isn't that a good thing? Thats the best way of learning!  
 
:)

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