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By Katanga
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13 May 2008 |
Just getting a bit 'gooeyly' ('gooily'?) reflective here!
A wistful fragment . . .
In Every Hollow
In every empty upturned hollow
Of my mind
Love lies sleeping
Down every silent road I follow
You're behind
Me still weeping
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Interesting
Written by Flexy5000 (7 comments posted) 13th May 2008 | Well said Katanga.
Short and nice. Please don't go looking. It will find you in its perfect time. But while you are waiting prepare your house to welcome it.
Lastly, please don't cry, for you will need your tears when it comes.
Well done. | Don't Cry?
Written by Katanga (1552 comments posted) 13th May 2008 | Thanks for this Flexy.
The lack of punctuation makes it ambiguous.
What I intended was 'You are still weeping, behind me on the road'.
Hmmmm! Think I'll leave it ambiguous!
Thanks again!
Cheers!
John |
Written by mia_ms_kim (1057 comments posted) 13th May 2008 | Gooey and soppy! Really, quite poingant. I like the first line of each stanza, they really paint a solemn picture. I like the ambiguity of the last line. I think it hints both might be weeping. This poem sort of seeps into you. Very gooey indeed. I like.
Mia  |
Written by mr_soul (126 comments posted) 14th May 2008 | | Yes the ambiguity of that line really makes this poem I think. Very nicely done. I often like poems left to interpretation and the way you've structured this certainly made it open. Liked this very much |
Written by Veronica_Milvus (769 comments posted) 15th May 2008 | | I like this one too. Because it is so.. compact, I might have dispensed with the initial capitals at the start of each line. but I like this very much, you are getting your poetic eye in, Tolstoy. |
Written by Josie (2851 comments posted) 15th May 2008 | | Yes, I go along with the others but not quite sure why she should be weeping. Please explain this one John. | Ah! Josie!
Written by Katanga (1552 comments posted) 15th May 2008 | Thanks to all of you above - this poem only came into being because the first line 'In every empty upturned hollow' hit me like a brick! It came from nowhere, but I thought "John! You've got to do something with this!" And so I did . . . The rest is silence.
Though I am very appreciative of the jolly noise this has generated - Keep it coming! X
I think Alice had got frustrated with me!
So, I had to do something with that line . . .
Josie - there are many reasons why I myself should still be weeping in my upturned hollows, and also many reasons why 'you' should be - lost love, bereavement, lost Oyster Card etc
See what I mean? Trying, failing, to be wistful!
Love,
John X
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