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Shorts
Abandoned
By Oops
26 November 2005

Ok, i wrote this ages ago....hopefully my writings have improved!?

I didnt even know what i was writing at the time to be honest, i just got in a writing mood, sat down, began to write and this was born.......


The young girl was curled up fast asleep on the sofa as her parents argued in hushed voices.
"We can't just leave her out there alone!" the Father argued
"We have no choice.  People wont accept us and we wont be able to show our faces respectably anymore" the Mother countered
"But she's just a child, our child" he pleaded
"Do you want to be an outcast? Be shunned by our friends? That's what will happen if we keep her.  We don't deserve that, we're good people.  This is Satan's child, only He would bring this monstrosity into our home.  If we send her away we'll be denying Him the opportunity to enter our lives.  Do you want to be punished by the Lord for caring for one of Satan's children?"
"No of course not.  I would do anything for the Lord but she's only a baby!"
"We have kept her hidden away this long, we wont be able to do it any longer.  She's already getting too big for the cage and she makes too much noise the neighbours have already started asking questions" she said.  The Father looked over to the sleeping form of his baby daughter.  The blanket his wife used to cover her face had fallen away and he could see the hideous growth.  He winced and looked away.  His heart was in conflict with his mind, his heart told him he loved his daughter regardless of her deformities but his mind teased him with thoughts of how life could be without her.  It used cruel words to torment him, hateful comments the neighbours would say; Devil worshippers, Satan's child.  They'd be run out of town, forced to live on the streets.  Her or us?  We can always have more children, good children, normal children.
"Ok" he nodded, giving in "we'll take her out tonight and leave her on the waste ground over the hill.  Someone may find her there and take her in".  His wife smiled a relieved smile "May the Lord bless us for casting out Satan's seed".
 
Nightfall was at least a couple of hours away so they both busied themselves around the house.  He deliberately kept himself away from his daughter.  He knew it was for the best but he had a bad feeling.  His wife worked away the time baking for tea.  Laying the table she called him in to eat.  Their daughter was locked away in her cage and out of sight so they could eat in peace.  Before they knew it night had crept upon them and it was time to take their daughter away.  As his wife got the child ready he checked to see if anyone was lurking around outside.  Seeing the course was clear he beckoned to his wife to bring their daughter.  She walked over to him and passed the child to him.  He looked at his wife,
"I'm sorry, I can't do it.  I can't go.  You have to do it alone" she pleaded.  He saw the desperation in his wives eyes and understood.  He patted her hand and then was gone.
 

He kept to the shadows as he made his way through town to the designated dumping ground.  His eyes darted back and forth looking for anyone who might catch him at his dastardly deed.  In his head his mind raged on, ‘am I doing the right thing' ‘life will be peaceful and normal without her, no more hiding' ‘she's our daughter, we love her' ‘she's brought nothing but shame'.  Then he remembered the look on his wife's face and his determination grew solid.  He crested the hill and looked down on the new home of his daughter.  It was bitterly cold tonight and he was glad his wife had wrapped the child in a blanket.  He picked out a sheltered spot and made his way down to it.  Putting his daughter down, he cleared away a space and laid his daughter in it.  He got up to leave and took one last look at his daughter, he took in her features, her left arm had only two fingers, her right was barely a stump, her right leg was badly deformed, but all these could be covered and hidden from the eye.  It was the growth that covered most of her petite face that was most disturbing.  It was an angry red colour and looked like it would burst at any moment.  With that final look he was gone.

 
The young girl's eye's opened and she saw a bright light.  As she screwed up her eyes the light was turned down.  The air was warm and soft and filled with the sound of soothing music.
"Ah your awake" a man's voice said from beside her "lay still.  You've had a terrible time," he continued as she tried to move
"Where am I?" she asked
"Your safe"
"Where's my Mummy and Daddy?"
"Your Daddy and Mummy are safe at home.  They brought you out to me, you was cold so I took you into my arms and brought you home" he spoke to comfort her.  The girl smiled.
"Do you know how old you are and what your name is?" he asked
The girl thought for a moment then answered
"Well, I am nearly 4 months old but I don't have a name"
"That's alright, I will give you a name" the man smiled
"My body is broken too," she added
"That's alright, I will give you a new body too"
"Mister, what's your name?" the child asked

"People call me God," he answered

Reviews
Soothing
Written by Rattle_Spear (93 comments posted) 26th November 2005
How many children are abandoned by their parents? Can God take them all in? 
Very emotional and well written. 
Any persons heart would bleed for the poor soul. :(

Written by jean.day (2257 comments posted) 26th November 2005
I was sort of hoping that the kind man who had taken her in was a human - and that he would give her the love and care she needed despite her problems. I know God would too - but it would have been nice, if perhaps not all that believable that someone might have wanted her. It certainly is a thought provoking story. I don't want to believe that there are people who would really do that to their child, but I expect it is all too true in some countries- although they probably would do it before the child was 4 months.
Thanx
Written by Oops (11 comments posted) 27th November 2005
Thank you guys, i must admit this was a complete no brainer...i just didnt think about what i was writing...does it show ;)  
 
thanks again :grin
this was so emotional
Written by darrenmc (54 comments posted) 28th November 2005
and in so few words, you did a great job here, it seems very spontaneous which means your feelings whilst writing it really come through. a very dodgy subject but you tackled it well; didnt expect god though, maybe a tramp or something, well, until the 4 month old girl started to talk! nice one. 
darren
provocative and intriguing
Written by kevinrobson73 (371 comments posted) 2nd December 2005
boldly transgressed boundaries 
turned it into a parable 
well done
well done
Written by white_lady (1 comments posted) 7th December 2005
hey well done, its absolutely amazing!! i was hooked thru the whole thing, u had no worries about showing people, look at the response. so where's more then??? :grin  
daisy x
Thanx
Written by Oops (11 comments posted) 7th December 2005
I would just like to thank everyone for the great reviews I have received....Im a little suprised to say the least...but again thank you very much :grin
Me too!!
Written by NuttyWithIt (38 comments posted) 11th December 2005
I liked it too!! Had me rivetted!!! Nice touch at the end. Glad the baby found somewhere nice to go, even if she did have to die to get there!! Hope the parents rot in Hell!!

Written by Tusk (53 comments posted) 19th March 2007
A very nice story superbly told. 
I liked the happy ending. Personally I'm not a fan of god or christianity, so it wasn't really for me, but I liked the message all the same. Would the four month old baby know what a month was?

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