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By mr_soul
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14 May 2008 |
I Could Have Been Wild And I Could Have Been Free, But Nature Played This Trick On Me
The people talking on the street,
The places where they often meet
Their music and it's tuneless beat
Make me want to cry
They're busy walking to their work
As the wealthy men curse their luck.
While they pass me standing on the dirt,
I breathe a heavy sigh
All around me these people dart
Yet from this world I feel apart
But I am human and I've a heart
My deviance, I wonder why
So happy in the life they own
The people speaking on their phones
Aimlessly, I walk these streets alone
And I want to die
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Written by Phil (6628 comments posted) 14th May 2008 | Not a personal piece, I hope. If it is - then all I can recommend is the Samaritans. 08457 90 90 90
If it's not personal - then I'll feel a bit of a fool.
Take care.
Phil |
Written by NathanRoberts (277 comments posted) 15th May 2008 | 'If you must write prose/poems
The words you use should be your own
Don't plagiarise or take on loan
'Cause there's always someone, somewhere...'
Only kidding. Morrissey is not a bad place to start as inspiration, some of the early stuff reads almost like poetry. It's worth noting that the bitter pill of self pity goes down easier in rock music where it's sugar coated with melody, harmony and in Morrissey's case a large dose of self-deprecating wit and a slyly aggresive attack on the status quo.
As a teenage fan of the Smiths in the eighties, from 'This Charming Man' onwards, I kinda sympathise with where you're coming from. Don't worry, I'm not about to say anything hideous like 'things get better' or 'you'll grow out of it'. Why lie, after all?!
As with Phil, I hope the suicidal feelings are not literal, though I believe you've written on the topic before and pointed out that the poem's weren't directly autobiographical.
I expect you're aware of Joy Division's 'Isolation' with it's typically glacial beauty, but also check out John Lennon's excellent 'Isolation' (if you haven't already) for another example of how anger can be effective when writing about these type of feelings.
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Written by mr_soul (126 comments posted) 17th May 2008 | Thanks Phil and Nathan.
No, I'm not suicidal lol. But I've noted the number for future reference Phil, thanks lol.
Nathan, I smiled at the "cemetry gates" lyrics. The irony is that Morrissey is famous for borrowing lines from poems, books and films. Morrissey and The Smiths have always been a source of comfort for me. People often say they're depressing yet he's written some of the most uplifting music I've heard. And I agree, it was the music that really makes it. So it's hard to pull off in poetry. He's one of the best lyricists ever though. I've not heard the songs you've mentioned, I'll check them out. Though John Lennon is
a legend, he's one of my favourites. He's one of the best songwriters ever, if not the best. I love him and The Beatles.
Although I didn't mean the last line, it's not to say I don't identify with most of this poem. It certainly was personal in some ways. I may have exaggerated things and the last line was certainly exaggeration, perhaps to make it more dramatic. And I suppose some people could identify with that.
As always, thanks for the comments |
Written by Robru (199 comments posted) 18th May 2008 |
I can identify with this one except for the last line. Maybe I just different. A good write and well done. I think I would change the last line to;-Sometimes I wonder why. Thats just my personal thought.
I like it as it is. |
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