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By Oops
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27 November 2005 |
Sulky clouds outside my window
Thunder in my head
Sat all alone
Steaming cup gone cold Had enough of crying inside You scare me into believing this feelings true
It makes me want to run and hide Let me surface to breathe
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A simple but effective piece
Written by twriter (117 comments posted) 13th December 2005 | Well crafted and written, any reason for the line breaks?
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Written by Oops (11 comments posted) 14th December 2005 | Thanx
No it just kinda happened like that! MS Word  | something...
Written by no1butClo (337 comments posted) 13th February 2007 | I like. change the format though, it's easier to read stuff when the poem's all in one piece.
reckon you could leave the last line out and still keep the title, I love "Let me surface to breathe" - it's a quiet desparation that really appeals to me.
well done x |
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