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Life (and Death) Throw Ed and Shirley a Curve |
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By Emmuttmax
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27 May 2008 |
My contribution to the vampire genre.
Life (and Death) Throw Ed and Shirley a Curve
The transformation couldn’t have come at a worse time for Ed Rassmussen. The 84-year-old retired, farm-implement salesman living in Glaston, Minnesota was in ill health and looking forward to dying, when Shelly, the next door neighbor’s teenaged, vampire daughter had gone and bit him. Now, he was turning into a bloodsucker himself.
Ed thought to himself, “Why couldn’t that little blond, belly-pierced, cheerleader have bitten someone younger, or, at the very least, sucked out all my blood and left me in a pile of dust? Now, I’m going to have to become a night predator, and I wear dentures. How the hell is that gonna work out?”
Ed’s wife Shirley was as upset as Ed. Her plans to spend her husband’s life insurance money on a cruise to Panama and a 48-ince flat-screen TV were now in ruins. It seemed that there was little choice but to become Ed’s minion, carrying out his daytime errands and keeping his coffin clean.
“Life sucked,” thought Shirley.
So did death.
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Written by Phil (7169 comments posted) 27th May 2008 | Liked this little flash. Not sure if you actually need that last line. Just what I'm coming to expect from you: well written, quirky and funny. Enjoyed very much. Phil | Written by shirley_keeldar (67 comments posted) 28th May 2008 | I like the irony in this! I may be inspired to try my hand at flash fiction... L x | Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3704 comments posted) 28th May 2008 | A clever and witty take on an age old theme. A bit short, it was over before I'd really got into the story. I liked the way vampires are just an accepted part of the reality of the story. A funny style it reminded me of an old film 'The lost boys' ;same sort of humour cheers jane | Written by Lizzy (857 comments posted) 28th May 2008 | liked this too, am still smiling. It makes a nice change to see others, and not the 'beautiful people' being bitten by vampires. Lizzy | Written by Emmuttmax (203 comments posted) 28th May 2008 | Thanks Lizzy, Jane, Shirley and Phil Shirley, try some flash; it's fun, and it beats being a minion.
| lol vampire with dentures Written by jennistar3 (21 comments posted) 1st June 2008 | I liked this especially, the whole dentures thing, ahaha that was a good one. I like how you decide to go from a humerous angle, rather than the whole dak and brooding thing... | Written by Emmuttmax (203 comments posted) 1st June 2008 | Hi Jennistar, The answer to your question is I try not to be predictable. I like to look at situations and imagine a surreal force enters it. |
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