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For Children


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The Dummy - a short story for younger children

By 1211kellie

02 June 2008

I wrote this story based on my two children's infatuation with their dummies, many a time I've been caught short with only one dummy in the house. Thankfully only the younger one still has his - but not for long.
Any comments good or bad much appreciated.

My baby sister Chloe lost her dummy again.

Mum looked in the toy box, dad looked in the dustbin and I looked in the kitchen cupboard. No dummies there, but I did find a tin of yummy baked beans and sausages.

“Whaaaaaaaaaaa! I want my nummy,” screamed Chloe.

Mum looked in the washing machine, dad looked in his work boots and I looked under the armchair. No dummies there, but I did find my red racing car and a piece of Lego.

“Whaaaaaaaaaaa! I want my nummy,” screamed Chloe.

Mum looked in the fridge freezer, dad looked in the laundry bin and I looked under the kitchen table. No dummies there, but I did find a half eaten bar of chocolate and a mouldy pea.

“Whaaaaaaaaaaa! I want my nummy,” screamed Chloe.

Mum looked in the oven, dad looked in the fruit bowl and I looked in the flower pot. No dummies there, but I did find a wiggly worm and half a yellow crayon.

“Whaaaaaaaaaaa! I want my nummy,” screamed Chloe.

Mum looked in the drawer, dad looked in the fish tank and I looked in the dog bed. Yes, I found it; Arthur the dog was asleep with it.

Mum gave Chloe a cuddle, dad sat down to read the paper and I washed the dummy. Peace at last; well, until next time.

“I love my nummy,” sighed Chloe.

Copyright 2008

Reviews

Written by Josie (4035 comments posted) 2nd June 2008

I'm afraid that dummies still do give a lot of comfort to children, and I know very well the "whaaaaaaa" sound. My little grandson, Daniel, loves his dummy. I think little children would like this story and I could see it in a book with the different places they looked for it on the opposite page so that children learn these names. Well done!

Written by mia_ms_kim (1057 comments posted) 2nd June 2008

A totally successful story! I had to read it to Nathan 6 times. I'm exhausted, but he so enjoyed it, especially the baby's scream. This is something any family can relate to, so can enjoy together.

I can easily see this one in one of the children's books with lovely illustrations.

Brilliant!

(I think you need a coma before the closing quote for each of Chloe's screams & sigh. ie. "...I want my nummy," screamed Chloe.)

Mia

Thanks
Written by 1211kellie (185 comments posted) 3rd June 2008

Written by 1211kellie (185 comments posted) 3rd June 2008

Thank you both for your lovely comments. I'm really pleased you all like it. I wasn't going to post it, but when I read it to my hubby he thought it was really good.

Kellie
Written by meadowcroft1964 (244 comments posted) 3rd June 2008

Hi

I agree with above

Fantastic!
Written by Katanga (4169 comments posted) 4th June 2008

So glad you decided to post this in the end - your hubby clearly has good judgement!

I agree with Josie and Mia - this simply begs for illustrations and would work marvellously!

Cheers!

John X

Written by mia_ms_kim (1057 comments posted) 4th June 2008

I had to read this to Nathan again 3 times yesterday after he came back from school. He requested it!

Perhaps you can do other pieces in a similar style. I think children really relate to pieces like this.

Mia

Written by Bonbon (19 comments posted) 5th June 2008

I loved this story so much I read it two times. Ithink it was great and I agree with Josie. :grin

Written by 1211kellie (185 comments posted) 5th June 2008

Once again, thank you for all your lovely comments.

Kellie

Hello
Written by littledom2008 (95 comments posted) 9th June 2008

This is really nice and very accurate. I've made more than one trip to the 24 hr garage when my little sisters found themselves dummy free come bedtime. Well done this is a lovely read.

D.C

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