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By RegisteredGhost
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20 June 2008 |
Small droplets of pearls
roll from closed lashes;
Sea water from nature
driping from coral cheeks
Like troubles falling briefly
Into a stormy, knocking sea.
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Written by mia_ms_kim (1054 comments posted) 20th June 2008 | I liked the imageries used in this piece.
Tears as pearls, coral cheeks etc - I liked these images, it seems to acknowledge and honour the pain behind the tears.
I particularly liked the image of tears as troubles falling briefly into the stormy sea. It puts all our troubles in perpective. They are temporal and small, really a bump in the road compared to the vast, stormy sea.
What didn't work for me was 'knocking' - it seems an incongruent image for the stormy sea. 'Sea water from nature' also felt a little too ordinary compared to the unusual and pretty images used in the poem.
But I liked the piece overall. Lovely with depth.
Mia  |
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