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Science Fiction and Fantasy
Sneak Peak of Locke and Loade : Dark Desires
By Thievesfire
22 June 2008
Righto you lot

For those who have been following my Locke and Loade : Blood Bond story you will know that the first chapter of Caleb's story is at an end.

However. I have decided to give you all a sneak peak at the second book of his story.

So here it is.

The first glimpse of a new part of Caleb's story.

Locke and Loade : Dark Desires.


SNEAK PEAK

I glanced up at her, but she wasn’t looking at me. She had her back turned, her arms folded, and I could tell she was trying not to cry. She refused to let me see her cry. I couldn’t bring myself to comfort her. I sat there, hunched up on the ground, my body stronger than ever, my heart and mind clear. The fields around me seemed that bit dimmer now. There was silence between us. How could I have let this happen, but then again, why shouldn’t have I? After all, I’d found my witch, she was the one who I would be with forever.

 

I closed my eyes and breathed in the sweet scents of flowers on the air, the flowers I held in my hand,

“Tallulah,” she didn’t turn to listen to me, she looked up at the sky, her head tilted, she sniffed, “I’m sorry.”

“No you’re not.” I blinked and gazed at the back of her, “You’re not sorry at all. This is all exactly what you wanted. You wanted some perfect blood bond with your witch so you could live happily ever after. What happened to our perfect ending Caleb?” she turned and faced me, defiant and with more strength than I could ever hope to possess, “If you don’t want me and my love then say it to my face. I’m not giving up on you.”

 

I couldn’t look at her, too ashamed. She seemed to gain some satisfaction out of it, I couldn’t say anything, how could I respond to that? What my brain was saying was different to what my heart was screaming at me.

“I thought so. You can’t say it can you? You’re a coward Caleb Grayson.” Her words were like shards of glass being scrapped along my skin, “You’re selfish and a coward, I don’t know why I want you, all you ever care about is yourself, about how you want things to be. Well here’s some news for you wolf boy; life ain’t listening. I’m not going to make this easy for you. If you want your witch, go to her, get out of my sight, crawl back to Kayleigh and have your perfect life. Because I may not stop loving you, but I sure as hell am not going to stand here waiting for you.”

 

And with that, she turned on her heel and walked away.


Reviews
Hey
Written by littledom2008 (95 comments posted) 22nd June 2008
:grin Ok enough teasing give us chapter one already.  
 
D.C
heheheheh
Written by Thievesfire (77 comments posted) 22nd June 2008
No :p

Written by littledom2008 (95 comments posted) 22nd June 2008
:grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin :grin PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
he
Written by Thievesfire (77 comments posted) 22nd June 2008
heh 
 
No

Written by Mr_E_Writer (187 comments posted) 23rd June 2008
One wonders just how: "I glanced up at her, refusing to meet her eye...," 
When: "She had her back turned...," 
 
Eyes in the back of her head? A sneak peak indeed!! 
 
 
 
:?
hey there
Written by Scrawl (80 comments posted) 24th June 2008
The piece is perfect for its intention - to ensnare readers. Well done. There is a typo, although it could be understood that Caleb wouldn't know she had turned her back until he looked, if that is the case it does need a little rephrasing. However, I for one have had my share of typos so, one typo ain't too bad since it is easily fixed. I'm with littledom on this, bring on the story. As soon as possible. I won't beg though *g*, I will ask nicely. Please can we have the nect bit soon? 
Thank you.

Written by stevetroster (1555 comments posted) 24th June 2008
Sorry Scrawl, but I'm going along with Mr.E. 
It is not a typo, it is a glaring mistake. 
You cannot refuse to meet someone's eye when they have their back turned. 
 
Thievesfire, I don't believe that I've read any of your previous work so I can only comment on this piece. 
If you intend to draw in a reader then you can't afford mistakes that will turn your reader off. 
This is, of course, only my opinion. 
 
Best wishes, 
Steve.  
Grammar!
Written by KaydieKate (63 comments posted) 24th June 2008
The biggest problem I see is you try to link two separate ideas with commas. 
 
"She seemed to gain some satisfaction out of it, I couldn’t move my lips." 
What does her gaining satisfaction have to do with you moving your lips? If there is, make it more clear. When you try to link separate ideas, you have to flush them out more, or else they sound like broken sentences. 
 
Overall, though, the piece draws you in. Though I myself would tone down the lovey-dovey drama, that's just me.
K
Written by Thievesfire (77 comments posted) 25th June 2008
Right. Just so people know the typos have been edited. Thank you for taking the time to comment.
Hey sweetie
Written by Goddess (124 comments posted) 4th July 2008
Before I say anything else, just want to point out to KaydieKate that this is a second book so the first book would explain the 'lovey-dovey'ness as you can it. It is not lovey-dovey if you have read the first book and understand how much the love between Caleb and Tallulah actually means. 
 
Rant over now. 
 
 
Spooks :)
 
Such a fantastic chapter and carries on perfectly from the last book. Brilliantly done and I love the balance of Tallulah's strength, anger and absolutely heart-wrenching despair! 
 
 
More PLEASSSEEE! :D 
 
 
Goddess xxx
YAAAAY!!!
Written by Thievesfire (77 comments posted) 6th July 2008
YAY! GODDESS IS BACK! JOY!! I'm glad you like it sweetheart!!
lol
Written by Goddess (124 comments posted) 8th July 2008
Yes then I disappear for another two weeks! lol I really enjoyed it though! Fantastic. More more more! 
 
 
Goddess xxx
*grins*
Written by Thievesfire (77 comments posted) 8th July 2008
Heh. 
 
No. 
 
:p I intend to make you all suffer for a bit longer.

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