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Poetry
Marital Bliss?
By marko2
04 July 2008

Hi guys, first post so be honest. I wrote this when my wife and I were having a tuff time. (We got through and are stronger than ever)




Why do I stay?
The kids thats why
She is not who I thought
She makes me what I am not
Wife, Mother, Lover
Well two out three
Well no, one ( and she 'aint doing that)
What a mistake
What a bloody fool
Got to get out
Got to get out
God hear me shout
I gotta get out!!!!!

Reviews

Written by Phil (6628 comments posted) 5th July 2008
Just as well you didn't, by the sound of it. 
 
It crystallises a thought. 
 
Phil

Written by NathanRoberts (277 comments posted) 6th July 2008
I think what makes it is its honesty and that line:'Wife, Mother, Lover', which is so loaded with possible meaning. 
 
The short lines capture the frustration and feel of these thoughts picking at your brain. 
 
Just a couple of things: 'The kids that's why' and 'Well, two out of three'. 
 
Also, I'm wondering if the fourth line could be shortened: 
 
'She makes me: 
Wife, Mother, Lover.' 
 
Not sure, just an idea. 

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