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Poetry
Heaven's Hostage
By Katanga
07 July 2008

Just a bit of 'dismal' to offset the jolliness of the recent limericks, which I've been thoroughly enjoyiing!

Rob, Brett - a rhymeless sonnet? Dunno!

Hey Ho!

Katanga X



Heaven’s Hostage

It was the cruellest winter that took you
away from me for ever then, and now
I long to hold you in my summer’s arms
and say the words that thawed your heart at first, 
“I love you now and always will. Before
I die, we will fulfil the truth of love
and not forsake our pleasure for a song
of decadence and longing till we die
from half-forgotten memories of truth,
which still belie my honesty and faith 
in all we left behind us when we lied
about our hearts’ integrity and strength."

Now Heaven will hold you hostage till I meet
the price of death – your final sweet release.

Reviews

Written by Phil (7169 comments posted) 7th July 2008
You asked me once about what I meant: it's there again - almost like a theme - or something like that. Well, it's here again. Many of your more serious serious pieces have a direct reference to death. Nothing wrong in that - just an observation. 
 
I don't understand enjambment - know what it is though! Some of your more recent pieces seemed to have pushed it quite far - less so here. For me, it plays havoc with the rhythms of a piece - especially when you go from verse to verse. (Not an issue here.) Again, not a crit - just an observation - and like I say - I don't understand it - so there may be a good reason for it. 
 
No good asking me if it's a sonnet. It has 14 lines and a closing couplet - does that qualify it? 
 
Phil 
 
 
 
Don't know how I missed this last night
Written by Brett (1113 comments posted) 8th July 2008
must have been all those bloody limericks.  
Yes, I'd say it was a sonnet in blank verse, if there is such a thing! 
Not sure about the metre of the opening line - I either read it in tetrametre or, if in pentametre, the stress falls rather awkwardly on 'that' rather than 'took.' Minor quibble. 
As for content, like Phil, I have noticed the big sleep being a recurring theme in your poems (and I agree with Phil that there is nothing wrong in this). There are some nice lines here; 
'...when we lied / about our hearts' integrity and strength.' 
Enjoyed. 
Cheers

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