Pound, throb, pound, throb, continual, unabating, never ending, my head aches so much now tears continually flow. I open my eyes and the room seems out of focus and revolving around me, people walking around seemingly in slow motion their voices echoing around – then blank!

Something inside my head stirs like a switch being turned on, first there was nothing then there was well, an acknowledgement of me. Seconds pass as recollections come and go opening my eyes then quickly shutting them as the light was very bright.

Sensations of having hands, legs and even a body creep into my head and mingle with everything else that seems to have come ‘alive’.

I hear voices and open my eyes a little, I try and move my head in the direction of the voice but it wouldn’t move. A panic sets in as I try and assess where I am and even who I am.

I emit a ‘grunt’ sound, I couldn’t think of anything else. A blurred vision appears in front of me and speaks, I ‘grunt’ again, the vision smoothes my forehead, turns their head and calls something.

More visions appear, colours seem to be coming through as now I see shades of green, blue and white. Noise all around me as they touch me and then they go away, all except one.

The vision sits down just out of my line of sight but I can hear, the noise seems to becoming clearer and I can recollect that words are being spoken to me, soft and meaningful.

More and more sensations return and a form of a more ‘fuller’ me, but I can’t move.

The noise now becoming words tell me that I’m in hospital, and that I am being looked after, it did put me at ease, well a little bit.

I open my mouth and try to speak and the voice tells me to relax, don’t fight it, let things take their time, I feel my brow being wiped as I sank back into oblivion.

The switch inside my brain flicked again and recollections came flooding back. Opening my eyes it was almost dark, I could see shapes around me but I couldn’t focus on any of them. I still couldn’t move but at least I was pain free. I lay there not knowing what to do, pathetic really I felt embarrassed in that I didn’t have any realisation of who I was, where I was and more important why!

I stared forward, I couldn’t do anything else my neck seemed to be held in a brace of some kind.

A shape came towards me quietly, said hello, the shape was female, her voice soft as she asked how I was. I didn’t really know what to say, I must have had a ‘look’ in my eyes as she said not to worry, it was evening that’s why it was dark, and would I like anything? My lips felt dry as I tried to make a sound, she reached and got a swab, dabbed it into water and wiped it over my lips. She asked me to try and open my mouth, as I did she replenished the swab and wiped the inside of my mouth, it felt so good. I said thank you, she smiled and said she would be back shortly she had another patient to see.

It seemed to take forever but was probably only a few minutes, all the time my mind seemed to become clear as if a mist was clearing. She came back, smiling, with a trolley. Everything was becoming more and more clear as if I had woken up, she asked my name, I must have had a look of panic because she said quickly not to worry that it was not important. She took my temperature and blood pressure and smiled as she wrote onto a clipboard. She said that I had been in an accident but didn’t have any details, she told me that the injuries were mainly to my head but that they needed me to lie still for as long as I could. Then said a doctor would be around shortly, she tidied up her trolley and moved it away.

I could smell her perfume, it was soft and gentle like her voice, a combination that put me at my ease.

But I still couldn’t make sense of where I was. A doctor appeared looking absolutely exhausted, she asked for the chart and asked how things were. Looking at me she smiled, more ‘work-manly’ no sense of softness just practicality, "you look fine", "more doctors will be around in the morning to see you, just try and rest" handing back the clipboard to the nurse she left us.

She asked me if I thought I could rest a little, I smiled and sank back into a dreamlike state.

Noises of trolleys rattling woke me from my dreams, as I opened my eyes light overpowered my senses, slowly but surely they recovered and shapes of the hospital ward became clear. Someone said ‘he’s awake’ and a nurse came to my side, again smiling, they always smiled, and said good morning, all I could say was thanks. I tried to speak but my voice was hoarse, she said not to try, would I like a drink to which I nodded.

Laid almost horizontal trying to drink water from a straw is not easy, she kept mopping around my mouth, the cool water felt good and seemed to relax my throat.

Everything from this point onwards became clearer as the 6 days spent in the ward progressed.

Nothing else seems to remain in my mind of the treatment I received except for the three times as I tried to come back around to the land of the living. I will never forget the calmness, softness and empathy that was extended to me from those who to them was a complete stranger, and for that I will be forever grateful.