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By NathanRoberts
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22 July 2008 |
These are the first:
fifteen grey spires
that pin the monotone horizon
of the low-lying cityscape
like an autopsy on God.
As the sun mouths a shimmering 'O',
milky white, a sheet of dew
softly overlays all legible time.
At similar height, a tower block,
overwritten with scaffold,
undergoes a surface cleaning
that misses its central spine -
the single working lift
that binds its tenants with a tone
of bleach and piss.
Inside, paramedics hold
their breath, as steel doors close
on a rigid, seated woman in her sixties.
A ghost, rubbed out in a single sentence,
a week or more ago.
Behind these daily chores,
the city seems unfathomable.
Somewhere, beyond or beneath,
nested on concrete,
at the base of the tower,
a blackbird learns to mimic a car alarm,
re-writing insecurities,
wiping over the morning's song
like a palimpsest.
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Fathoms! Written by Katanga (1537 comments posted) 22nd July 2008 | Fathoms deep, Rob! This is fabulous, but I need to revisit soberly to say why . . . 'A ghost, rubbed out in a single sentence, . . . . ' Incredible! Cheers! John X
| Written by NathanRoberts (277 comments posted) 23rd July 2008 | Cheers John, I rather like the idea that people may feel the need to be inebriated before they can approach my attempts at poems. | Written by Phil (7007 comments posted) 23rd July 2008 | I'd never considered the possibility of an architectural palimpsest - but this works really well. Graphic and effective. Phil | A ghost . . . Written by Katanga (1537 comments posted) 23rd July 2008 | . . . in a poem, and I am still in awe! If ever I suss why, I'll get back to you! Respect! John X | Written by NathanRoberts (277 comments posted) 24th July 2008 | Phil: 'I'd never considered the possibility of an architectural palimpsest ' Apparently it's used fairly commonly amongst architects, meaning a ghost image of a previous building or feature. I also used it in a more general metaphoric way, for that process of wiping away one thing and replacing it with another, the layering of time, sequences, memories, lives and landscapes constantly changing, as well as tying it in with this mist descending over a city, obscuring it, wiping it clean. John: I don't think you always have to know why you like a poem. It can be interesting to analyse it, and it can sometimes help the author, but it's more about the actual enjoyment when it comes down to it. |
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