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Pathetic Bob's Olympic Review |
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By Emmuttmax
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13 August 2008 |
Pathetic Bob's Olympic Review
Last night, I was nestled in my leather recliner beneath a blanket of dogs, watching some of the Olympics coverage on NBC, when I asked Pathetic Bob how he liked the Beijing games so far.
“The actual competition is great,” he said, “but I’m already sick to death of the talking heads, the attempted Chinese P.R. coup, the words ‘dream,’ ‘mom,’ ‘sacrifice,’ and ‘McDonalds,’ and the fact that, once again, greyhounds were banned from competing.”
“Yeah,” I agreed, “All those commercials could make you think the way to Olympic glory is through calorie-laden fast food and Budweiser beer. But, any company willing to put up millions of dollars can hitch their names to the Olympics. Drink Coca Cola, it’ll corrode a nail, but make you jump higher. Let’s face it Bob, there are not really any ‘games’ left, only business. I’ve got to admit though; I still love the thrill of individual competition. Mano y mano, womano y womano, may the best person win.”
Bob sighed and summoned up the sarcasm that lay just beneath the surface of his tongue. “Yeah Em, sort of like that little Chinese girl that was the best singer, but got replaced at the opening ceremonies by bright-eyed, lip-syncing pixie because she wasn’t cute enough to represent a billion of her countrymen. I hope they at least gave her a Big Mac and a beer.”
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Written by stevetroster (1601 comments posted) 12th August 2008 | Nope, probably just an extra bowl of rice, perhaps a few noodles.
Quick off the mark there, Mike. Perhaps speed writing should be an olympic event?
All the best,
Steve. |
Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3590 comments posted) 12th August 2008 | I loved the idea of being under a blanket of dogs,sounds like bliss.
Bob is getting a bit cynical but I've heard Greyhounds are prone to it.
As said quick off the mark and very witty
much enjoyed
jane
[P.S if you have cable watch it on BBC, they don't have adverts] |
Written by Canadian_Bacon (120 comments posted) 13th August 2008 | The solution: stop watching NBC.
Canada's CBC or Britain's BBC both have less advertising (CBC still airs commercials though) and the coverage is far less biased (well I don't know that for sure about BBC...but I imagine it's true lol). It's the way NBC hypes the American athletes relentlessly and then makes excuses for them when they under perform that makes me stick to Canada's coverage. Maybe it's because we have nothing to hype about :P
I have to agree with Jane about "a blanket of dogs". Personally I would never want to be covered in dogs, but it's a great image and it conjures up nice sensory details.
Also, can we add 'Phelps' to the list of banned words please?
| Choose the BBC!
Written by Jimmy15 (12 comments posted) 13th August 2008 | ... that way there will be NO ads!
I really liked this - very 21st Century! |
Written by Phil (7001 comments posted) 14th August 2008 | 'Blanket of dogs' - so long as they're not damp - it does sound inviting.
Enjoyed the read.
Phil |
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