Approaching 20 one can't wait to be grown up.
Approaching 30 one suddenly realizes what one might have missed.
Just like teenagers, people in their twenties have a strange relationship with age. Teenagers often consider themselves big boys and girls, ready to bear the responsibilities of an adult. The same goes for students, although a night out in an average student town will show they aren't: Peeing against churches, throwing up in the street or falling into the canal aren't exactly great examples of responsible behaviour...
One of the greatest ironies is that students often seem to think it's necessary to show off their adultness by drinking too much alcohol, staying up till sunrise and skipping lectures. They live on pizzas and microwave meals and occasionally there is one that knows how to boil pasta. Laundry is taken to mummy and daddy in the weekends and money seems to come from them as well. Yet somehow there comes a moment when they realize how much like children they actually are. They also realize this has a certain charm. They can afford to behave like that. Life isn't as serious as they always thought and it's not yet time to grow up. Instead of drinking till they drop, they start doing creative things they loved to do when they were kids. They join theatre groups because it's so much fun to run around like a complete loony or to dress up like a knight or a pirate. Is it surprising that games like Dungeons and Dragons are so popular with students? Who doesn't want to play with plastic action figures and pretend to be fighting monsters? TV shows aimed at young teenagers (Charmed, Buffy etc) get a cult status and people paint the walls in their rooms pink, orange or other strange colours. After all, this is the last chance to be young. If you always wanted to live in a baseball stadium or Barbie's dream villa, this is your chance: Be young, be crazy... And then they graduate and the world changes once again. Boys become men and girls become women. Isn't it striking that we already refer to each other as such? Recently a friend told me I was so mature, yet I wonder... Is that a good thing? Or is it only a sign that 30 is approaching way too fast? |
Written by Robru (272 comments posted) 20th August 2008 | From a parents point of view, I think that children should be allowed to be children with a certain amount of guidance as they grow. We parents often expect too much too soon and then wonder what happened to the child we made.
The child is still there, just needs room to breathe.
Most students go through a variety of changes as their lives and experiences progress. Us parents just hope the changes are for the better.
This story highlights some of the changes and pressures students face.
Cheers
Bob |
Written by Phil (7001 comments posted) 20th August 2008 | And it's all over far too quickly. I still manage to fall in the odd (metaphorical) canal though.
George Bernard Shaw: Youth is wasted on the young.
Interesting read - but I think it needs moving over to non-fiction. There's enough formless stuff on the poetry forum already!
Phil | Please!
Written by Katanga (1537 comments posted) 20th August 2008 | Put it in the non-fiftion section, as Phil suggests.
I tried to read it as poetry, and sorry, it was mundane as hell.
Seen this argument many times before . . . | John - Please!
Written by Brett (1001 comments posted) 20th August 2008 | Surely, anyone can see that this has been erroneously posted in the poetry forum, and is not meant to be read as such - unlike some posts that are meant to be taken as poetry and are truly mundane!
Cheers | Okay! Whoops!
Written by Katanga (1537 comments posted) 20th August 2008 | Sorry - my mistake!
And your point taken . . .
Cheers!
John |
Written by mia_ms_kim (1057 comments posted) 20th August 2008 | Maybe you are describing self-indulgent young people, FM, who come from reasonably well-to-do families. When children grow up in families where parents have to work hard to provide education for them, they tend to grow up faster, I think. I went to school with many immigrant kids, and quite a few of them were helping their parents work in the evenings and on weekends. A friend of mine who is a university lecturer tells me most of her students work part time to support themselves, and they have very little time to indulge themselves.
And as a mother who has to watch her child grow up, my concern is not so much the young people drinking and throwing up, but drink-driving and killing themselves and others, experimenting with drugs and becoming addicts, teenage pregnancy and STI's etc.
I think how long people can stay "young", ie. enjoy "growing up" depends on their circumstances.
Mia  |
Written by Fledermaus (3506 comments posted) 20th August 2008 | Thanks everyone.
Yes indeed this is non-fiction, as I avoid the poetry section, but for some reason the default for a post is poetry...
The main point was that it seems that the less grown up people are, the more they seem to make an issue of being grown up, yet when they realize that growing up is inevitable, they suddenly aren't so hasty anymore.
I think I have to learn a lot about life myself, but I do notice it's all going very fast now.
And of course the type of student I describe is a stereotype. Few people in my circle of friends would behave like that, but there are other things that do make me realize that many of us are actually somewhere between being kids and being grown up. | Hi Ron
Written by jean.day (2387 comments posted) 20th August 2008 | I read your story with interest. I can't say that as a young adult, I was much like your stereotype - and worked to put myself through college - and my daughters were more like me than those you mention. But my son absolutely loved Dungeons and Dragons and Paint Ball type play groups and belonged to the Viking Society. But I think even he has grown up now - at least I hope so as he is approaching 40.
But thinking back to my college days, we did get stopped by the police once in a graveyard where we were drinking beer (under age as the legal drinking age in ND is 21) and how we all started kissing the person next to us (many of whom we didn't really know) so the cop would think it was a necking party rather than a boozing party. And one of my girlfriends got put in jail overnight for being drunk - so maybe it wasn't quite so responsible as I try to remember it. |
Written by Fledermaus (3506 comments posted) 21st August 2008 | Hi Jean,
Well it is a huge generalization of course, but it does seem that especially freshmen seem to live up to the stereotype of students, while older students often seem to get a bit nostalgic about being young  |
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