An enchanting paradise

That’s where I always go

Ideal for all discerning men

Like me, I’m in the know

Yes, I’m strolling down a postcard beach

A beauty on each arm

At my approach, the other guys

Retreat in some alarm

My tanned and well-honed body

Makes them all turn green

With envy, as they know it is

The finest one they’ve seen

I lay back on the golden sand

This is utter bliss

One lady cuddles up to me

We’re just about to kiss

That’s when I wake up with a start

And blink at Blackpool Tower

I check my watch and realise

I’ve slept about an hour

No super models on each arm

No men, resentful, stare

Just plain old me, all covered up

Ensconced in my deck chair

The tan has faded, muscles gone

Just white flab, no six pack

My tide went out some time ago

And won’t be coming back

So that’s why in the future

I shouldn’t try to find

The perfect place to get away

I’ll holiday in mind