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Every Now and Then
By Alexis.G
20 September 2008
A/N: Like it or hate it? Please R & R (read and review), whichever way you feel!

Now:
I am the voice of experience.
The lesson to be learned.
The example not to be followed.

Then:
I was Evan.
Simply Evan
Just a boy.

But that was then, and there’s absolutely nothing simple about now. Now is the only guarantee I possess. Because if there’s anything this past year has taught me, it’s that there are few, if any, certainties in life.

The name Evan Brown has many different meanings to suit that many different people life has gifted me.

Evan was a good boy.
Evan was a manipulative wretch.
Mister Brown was a poor Mathematics student.
Brown, highly gifted. Such a waste…
Patient 2282 refuses to eat salted carrots.
Our son Evan was… disappointing? Surprising?
Evan was debauched.


But the thing is, I’m not a bad person. Not an incorrigible one at the very least. I admit that I’m not a saint, but I can swear that all I have done is the result of a simple conviction. That conviction being to do what is right, or necessary. Isn’t that all anyone, anywhere can hope for?

Reviews
Interesting
Written by Larnyx (10 comments posted) 20th September 2008
Short story or more of a character introduction? 
sound slike a very interesting fellow, and he defiantely shows many connections to reality

Written by Emmuttmax (203 comments posted) 20th September 2008
Alexis, There is a saying "Less is more," but I believe in this case less is less. There is just not enough for me to go on to judge this as a story. 
 
The underling on bold words were distracting; they didn't add to the piece. 
 
"Because if there’s anything this past year has taught me, it’s that there are few, if anything, certainties in life."  
"Anything" should be changed to "any." Actually, you should re-read the first full paragraph and reconsidered your sentences. 
 
This may be an interesting story.

Written by bluecity (432 comments posted) 21st September 2008
Alex, this started off very well indeed. I was settling down to a very interesting read when... you stopped. 
 
I'm not very happy about your sentence construction. We have moved away from the time when every word had to be in a sentence, but your clauses which are not sentences do come across as a bit clunky.  
 
I loved the 7 phrases summing up Evan. He sounds like a fascinating bloke and a great mc. I think all writers should write 7 phrases describing their main character before they even think of writing the first word. ...I'm off to do that now for my novel, btw. 
 
Rosemary

Written by tomhonnor (14 comments posted) 23rd September 2008
I like how original this piece is shapping up to be. It is difficult and I imagine there are no apologies for that. Like Irvine Welsh writing Trainspotting.  
 
It did end rather abruptly though, any more...?  
 
Can't really judge unti I've read some more. Could be interesting though.

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