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Non-Fiction
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| 'Mauve Lies': Amusing, Mean or More | |
| By Vanderlay | ||||||
| 25 February 2006 | ||||||
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Lying for the sake of lying, great! ‘Mauve Lies’: Amusing, Mean or More? The main reason that frogs have webbed feet is that they are descendants of the Duck family. True? Course not idiot! This is an untruth, a fib or more accurately a ‘mauve lie’. Not to be confused with a ‘white lie’, which is the stretch of truth for the benign benefit of others, a ‘mauve lie’ is the name of a new craze that involves making up a falsity and telling someone just for the fun of it. No satire is allowed when ‘mauving’, believability and funniness are both optional. Everyone knows humour is best enjoyed in groups; giggling gaggles at comedy clubs slapping their thighs, red faced shakes of the head; ‘I cant believe that he/she just said that!’, somebody does that laugh through the nose; the one that sounds like a pig snorting or a snore and the communal hysteria reaches new heights. Elbows are used to nudge neighbours; conformation of a ‘gotten joke’, the stand-up on stage like some demented preacher looks down upon his congregation admiring the view and invites the waves of chuckles over him. People leave happy and closer, all have shared a titter together; a bond has been formed, the chortle connection. The new backstreet wit of the ‘mauve lie’ however is a double edged beast that can be less inviting and mutual. This type of humour arises from a ludicrous statement presented as a fact and is only achieved straight faced, the recipient then realises the bizarreness of the announcement and cracks up. While this sounds like an innocent jest there are those caught in the quip crossfire. What happens to those who wouldn’t think to question why someone would spontaneously lie to them, those not necessarily gullible just admirably honest, how does this comedy affect them? This is where ‘mauve lies’ become more disturbing, the sinister element is born when the jokester tries to get away with the feint and the tricked sap is none the wiser. In this case the only person actually benefiting from the joke is the one telling it, undoubtedly this is a self congratulatory act and in that sense slightly unnerving. Even more startling is the rise of what’s known as an ‘anti-truth chain’ whereby the lie is innocently passed by one naïve target to the next. Who knows where an unwitting ‘anti-truth chain’ could lead? Obviously ‘mauve lies’ can cause suspicion and mistrust on two counts: The over usage of the ‘joke’ induces paranoia, the brain starts to wonder whether everyone is doing this all the time and paranoids begin question every fact ever and eventually end up enrolling in science or history courses. One witness, wishing to remain anonymous (Jason Roberts), described the feeling of falling for a ‘mauve lie’ as ‘a dirty sensation’ adding ‘I needed a shower when I realised what had happened, how somebody could do this to another is beyond me, I still shudder at the words: “Did you know a cigarette contains a number of household chemicals including bleach and even traces of marmalade”, I told all my friends they were puffing on jam! It will haunt me forever.’ This side of the ‘mauve lie’ is unquestionably anti social, the egoistic nature of the humour takes the term ‘inside joke’ to a whole new level. Has the society in which we live in affected our comedy styling that much? People more and more are adhering to the values individualism and the sense of community in civilization is diminishing rapidly, the ‘mauve lie’ could just be a product of it’s time, a shift in attitudes towards others reflected in farce. If this is so then surely it’s also a reflection on our culture and those who say ‘What’s good for me… is me’, not even needing a reaction to a joke, just the self important knowledge that there was one and if someone got it, well fine, if not…hey even better! In turn this humour raises questions about the need to feel superior, the idea that something with absolutely no validity can be passed on without question brings a sense of triumphant ‘Beadles Aboutism’ that’s more rife today than ever. Or does act of ‘mauving’ simply mirror our political state of affairs. People now know the government lies and accept it, it’s become a fact of modern lives, ‘of course their lying their politicians!’ we say, ‘duh!’, and this admission, seemingly on all parts of everything, has desensitized fibbing in all walks of life. So is that what we are now? Do we just make things up? And is that so wrong anyway? I suppose lying for your own amusement isn’t that bad really at least not when compared to this new happy flicking craze. Remember, stay on your guard and if you hear the following don’t reply ‘really?!’ [] Nelson actually had two perfectly working arms and was secretly an excellent cross weaver; he was just an addict of sympathy. [] Pluto is discredited as a planet as it is an optical allusion. [] Art Garfuncal is the great, great nephew of George Washington. [] The English name ‘Stella’ is used in American séances to contact the spirit of Marlon Brando. [] The Republican Party started out as a dancing troupe in 1840’s West Virginia. [] Gordon Ramsey used to work in the Little Chef but was fired when found to be too tall. [] Etiquette used to teach that toes should face outward or ‘ten to two’ when engaged in shaking hands with someone. This was born out of a fear of awkwardness in case toes touched. [] ‘Mauve lies’ aren’t as self gratifying as they seem.
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