Great Writing - Home > Comedy > 18 with a bullet
READING ROOM
Great Writing - Home
Read and review others' work
Articles on writing
Advice from the community
COMMUNITY
Talk to others in the forums
Events and Competitions
GW News
ABOUT GREAT WRITING
All About Us
Contact Us
WORK AWAITING REVIEW
GW IS...
Great Writing creative writing community is designed to prompt ideas and provide inspiration and motivation within aspiring and amateur authors. Whatever your topic; from love poetry to Doctor Who or Harry Potter fan fiction, Great Writing's online writing group is where you can make new friends and improve your creative writing.
WHO'S ONLINE
We have 1072 guests online and 10 members online
Comedy
18 with a bullet
By sasquatch
03 March 2006
this sketch is based on the scene from resevoir dogs when everyone has a gun pointed at each other and they all cop it.
It seems that since then you cant turn around without some film trying to promote itself by ripping off this scene. there is a new one with Mike from Neighbours that does it again and that was my inspiration.

so anyway;

the scene is resovoir dogs, men in black suits lose their temper and the accussations of treachery fly. they all whip out their pistols and find themselves in the familiar stand-off. the first part of the gag is the amount of people involved in this standoff, perhaps 12 to 15, each having their own whoosing shot of them pulling their gun out.

They are all standing their poised to shoot when suddenly another arm holding a gun comes out of nowhere from a strange angle, possibly from above.

The guy closest eyes it nervously.

'Whos gun is that?'

'i dont know'
'its not mine'
'it aint fucking mine either'

comes the chorus

then another comes in from nowhere. again we only see the gun and the black clad arm but not who is holding it.

'who the fuck is that'

with increasing panic

'what the fuck is going on'

another gun comes in possibly from directly below this time.

one guy shouts 'fuck this' and the shooting starts. we dont see it however and instead see the wall of the warehouse. we hear as many many bullets are fired.

after a while we go back and they are all still there, no one apparently got hit.

'anyone hurt?' one of them asks

a chorus of 'not me' comes back.

'ok...who wants a beer?' ventures another'

a chorus of approval meets him and they all slope off.




needs a better end?

Reviews
I think so
Written by givitsum (651 comments posted) 3rd March 2006
Yep, for me, I would say yes. The build up is good, very Police Academy - esque, but just the last 2-4 lines need a bit more kick. 
 
Good one though. Don't know why but I expected a huge octopus in a black suit to be the punch here.
ok lets go to work
Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3331 comments posted) 16th March 2006
I always thought that film cried out to be spoofed. I didnt really buy into it, so I liked your take much more; lots of shooting and no-one gets hurt-- as you say who needs a better end. It's as if Richard Curtis had written Resevoir Dogs.....If only Tarrantino had written Nottinghill

   Only registered users can rate and write comments.
   Please login or register.

Powered by AkoComment 2.0!

 Previous item   Next item