'I can't believe you are doing this Claire. You know absolutely nothing about this man. Nick left you provided for so you don't need to rush into a new job straight away. Why can't you wait and look for a live out job in Bristol?'
'Because I don't want to Zoe. Simon seems like such a nice person, Livie is wonderful and the village is beautiful. I'm going and I'm not debating about it with you.'
'I think this is a mistake Claire.'
'Right now Zoe I don't want your advice. I know you are just worried about me but I've made my decision. Please just let me do this. I'll only be a few miles away and Simon said I was to feel comfortable in the house and was welcome to have visitors. You could come up see it for yourself?'
'I don't know.' Claire watched as her sister shook her head and sat down of the sofa, she knew her well enough to know that she was weakening, giving in.
'I know what I'm doing Zoe. It would be good for me to get away from here for a while, from all the memories.'
'Okay, fine. I know you are too stubborn to change your mind. I'll keep an eye on the house for you but I'm definitely coming to visit you and if I get any whiff that this guy is a psycho I'll drag you out of there.'


Simon wasn't sure why he felt so anxious that morning but it dissipated when he opened the door and met Claire with a box of her belongings in her arms.
'Here, let me carry that for you.'
'This is one of the light ones, some heavier ones in the boot if you really want to help?'
Once the bags were unpacked and Claire had settled in she made her way to to the kitchen, wanting a cup of coffee. It seemed strange to be doing something so mundane in someone else's kitchen. Just as she drank the last drop of coffee she heard Simon call her name.
'I'm in the kitchen.'
'Just going to take Livie for a walk, want to come with us, see the sights?'
'Sounds like a plan and on the way you can tell me about Livie's routine and what you need me to do for her.'
Simon already had Livie in her pushchair so Claire grabbed her coat. Simon's house was almost the last one and was surrounded by lush Welsh countryside. There was a footpath outside the house but it only went a few yards to the left before disappearing into hedgerows. In the other direction they could follow it into village.
'A country stroll or explore the village?'
'How about the village, you can show me if there is a local shop, is there a park to take Livie to and let me get my bearings.'
'The village it is then.'
As they walked down the main street of the village Claire was overwhelmed by how many people stopped them, Simon introduced Claire to each of them as Livie's new Nanny and in return they all gave her a warm welcome. As they neared the small village park, which elicited much excitement from Livie and shouts of 'swing' one woman approached them from the opposite direction with a similarly excited child.
'Hi Simon. Hello Livie, coming for a push on the swings?'
'Swing!' Livie said pointing towards the swing set.
'Hi Mandy, this is Claire, Livie's new Nanny.'
'Hi there. Pleased to meet you. I'm Mandy and we'll probably be bumping into each other quite a lot, very active social circle these toddlers have you know!' Mandy said whilst motioning to her boy and Livie.
'This is Sam by the way.'
Simon and Mandy where clearly old friends and very at ease with each other. Sam and Livie swung between happily laughing together and crying at each other. Claire was surprised at how quickly time passed in their company.
'Come on then Sam, we better get you home for some lunch and a nap. Would you like to come round for a coffee in the week Claire and I can fill you in on all the village gossip?'
'Sounds great.'


That afternoon, whilst Livie had her nap, Simon talked Claire through Livie's routine, what she liked to eat, play dates, friends, doctors details and favourite toys. After showing her where she would find everything she needed around the house they sat down together in the kitchen.
'I hope you don't mind me asking but I wondered what Livie knows about her Mother?'
'She has pictures of her in a little plastic album which I show to her and tell her Mummy is in heaven with the angels but that's all we have ever talked about. I suppose you would like to know more?'
'Not if it's too painful. I didn't ask to be nosey, I just wanted to know how to deal with it should it ever arise.'
'A few months ago I would have said it was too painful but I've learnt to talk about what happened. Margaret told you that day in the teashop that Louise died after she gave birth to Livie, right?'
'Yes, but she didn't say anything more than that.'
'Everything went well with Livie's birth and they were both home from the hospital within two days. We all seemed to be coping with the sleepless nights and routine of feeding, cleaning, sleeping. Then about two weeks later Louise complained to me a few times about chest pains. I told her to see our Doctor or at least tell the Health Visitor, she kept telling me she would mention it but neither of us took it that seriously. Then a week later I went out, I was only gone about an hour and when I came home the first thing I heard was Livie screaming. I called for Louise but she didn't answer. I went up to the nursery and got Livie, she needed changed so I did that and calmed her. Louise still hadn't answered me so I went looking for her. I found her just outside the back door, by the herb garden. She was just lying on the ground barely breathing and unconscious. The ambulance rushed her to the hospital; she was taken straight into surgery but they weren't able to save her.'
'I'm so sorry Simon, I shouldn't have asked.'
'It's okay. I was so angry for a while. If only she had told her doctor, they could have given her treatment but she didn't and she suffered a pulmonary embolism. I blamed myself.'
'Why, what could you have done? You can't blame yourself.'
'I thought I should have made sure she had told her doctor, should have known more about the risks, shouldn't have left her alone. We were just so wrapped up in coping with having Livie. I've come to terms with it now but I'll always regret not being there for her at the end.'
Simon was surprised at himself for opening up so much to this woman he barely knew but he was even more shocked at just how good it felt when she threw her arms round his neck giving him a comforting squeeze.


On Sunday Simon takes Livie and Claire out for a pub lunch in the village, he introduces her around the villagers that are there and again everyone gives her a warm welcome, until two women hail Simon from across the pub.
'Simon, aren't you going to introduce us to your new friend. Ruby and I are quite anxious to know who she is.'
'Sue, Ruby this is Claire and...'
Before Simon could utter another word Sue cut in, 'and who are you Claire and how do you know our Simon?'
'Simon has just hired me to be Livie's Nanny.'
Sue turns to Ruby, 'the new Nanny, well that is good news.' Then turning back to Simon, Sue continued, 'you'll have no more excuses to avoid one of my dinner parties now Simon, Claire will be able to stay with Olivia whilst you come out with us. It's very cruel of you to always leave Ruby as the odd number.'
'I expect to be very busy at work now that I can fully concentrate on it again. I've been asked to prepare drawings for that new house being planned just outside the village, very near your place Sue.'
'Oh really, tell me more, I've been wondering what sort of monstrosity we could be expected to cope  with.'
Simon seemed relieved to get the topic of conversation changed and Livie was pulling on Claire's sleeve so Claire followed her as she went for a toddle around the pub.


'Poor Simon, looks like you've left him in the lion's den.' Claire looked up from Livie to see Margaret from the tea shop, leaning conspiratorially towards her. She reached down to scoop Livie up. 'Hello there lovely Livie. So you got the job then, I hear?'
'Yes, partly thanks to you.'
'It'll be good for Simon and Livie to have you around and you look a bit brighter yourself.'
'They are such a lovely family and everyone in the village has given me such a welcome.'
'We aren't a bad bunch, well most of us anyway.' Margaret said whilst nodding towards Sue and Ruby. 'You had the pleasure of meeting Sue then?'
'I wouldn't exactly call it a pleasure but we sort of met.'
'She's been hounding Simon ever since Louise was buried. Thinks he is the most eligible man; determined to pair him up with her sister Ruby.'
'Ruby is her sister?'
'Wouldn't know it to look at them would you?' Claire had to agree with that. Sue, with her blonde, immaculately styled hair, manicured nails, made up to perfection and dressed head to toe in designer clothes, whilst Ruby had mousey brown straight hair, no make up, was dressed in very simple jeans and fleece and her nails looked bitten to the quick.
'Are they from around here?'
'No. Sue married Charles Williamson. The Williamson's have lived around here for centuries in that big manor house outside the village. Charles is the second son so his elder brother, Edward, inherited the house. Their father still lives up there too but he handed over the house and business to Edward a few years ago. If you ask me Sue has never forgiven the rest of them for making her move into the house in the village; she liked being Lady of the Manor up there.'
'Why did she move out?'
'Charles has never really been all that interested in titles and the family business. When Charles first married Sue he wanted to buy her a house of their own but at the time Edward wasn't married and the family all insisted that he and Sue move in. Sue was only too pleased to go along with them. Then Edward goes to Russia on business and brings home this girl who claims to be descended from Russian nobility and marries her. Sue and Elena clashed immediately so Charles took the opportunity to move into the house in the village.'
Intrigued by the two women who had captured Simon, Claire wanted to know more. 'What about Ruby?'
'Sue has plenty of airs and graces but they are all fake. Way I hear it she grew up in Lawrence Hill in Bristol and when she got into the Williamson family she moved Ruby up here with her. Been trying to marry Ruby off the someone with money ever since. Poor Ruby, quiet as a lamb and that Sue one bullies the life out of her.'
Margaret scooped Livie into her arms, gave her a loving squeezed and said, 'come on Live, let's go rescue your daddy.'


A few moments later they were seated and waiting for the dinner they had ordered. After bringing Livie and a relieved looking Simon back to her, Margaret had gone to join her husband, John, at the bar leaving the three of them together.
'I heard you mention drawings to Sue. You never really have told me what you do?'
'Really? Thought I had. I'm an architect. I run a firm with my business partner, Tom. We've known each other since our university days; he lives over in Ross-on-Wye where the office is. He's took on running things pretty much single handed for the last year but he can't keep going like that and it's time I did my fair share again. Tell you what, I'm going to spend all day in the office tomorrow so why don't you bring Livie over to Ross and we can meet for lunch?''



'Claire, where have you been? I mean one phone call to let me know you were still alive wouldn't have been so difficult would it? I've been going out of my mind wondering if you were okay.'
'I'm really sorry Zoe, it's just that we have been really busy.'
'We?'
'Well, Simon, Livie and I.'
'Sounds quite the cosy family.'
'It's not like that Zoe and how could you even think that?'
'I'm sorry Claire, I'm just worried about you. This new job, moving away, it just all happened so suddenly. It feels like you're running away.'
'It's just too good a job to miss out on. Simon has been showing me around the village and introducing me to the villagers to help me settle in. He went back to work full time today so it's just me and Livie now and it's so lovely here.'
'Molly misses you, she's been asking for you.'
'Why don't you give me a couple of weeks to get settled in and then come up for a visit. I told you that Simon said you were welcome and maybe you would feel a bit more content if you could see I am fine?'
'That would be nice. I could do with a day away.'
'Bring Molly with you and I'm sure you could stay over. There is a spare room with a double bed. James could come as well.'
'I'm sure James will be much too busy but Molly and I would love to come.'


Shortly after Zoe hung up and whilst Claire was reading yet another tale of Upsy Daisy to Livie the phone rang again. This time it was the landline.
'Claire? Of course, what other woman would be answering the phone! It's me – Mandy.'
'Hi Mandy. Are you looking for Simon? He's gone back to the office today.'
'No, I was hoping to catch you. Want to come round to my house for coffee on Thursday morning and meet a few of the local Mums?'
'I'd love to.'
Simon had suggested Livie had a nap before they met him in Ross so that she would not be tired over lunch. Claire thought a walk and some fresh air would help tire Livie out so she wrapped Livie up, got her into the pushchair and headed into the village.
'Swing!' Livie eagerly shouted as soon as the park came into sight.
'How about we have a stroll first and then have a swing on the way home?'
Livie didn't look so sure so Claire walked on hurriedly. Walking down beyond the pub Claire noticed a sign for a Library and decided to investigate thinking it would be a good source of books for both Livie and herself and they might have some baby and toddler groups advertised.
As Claire was trying to heave the bulky pushchair up the two small steps into the library the door was flung open and someone flounced straight into her almost knocking Claire and the unbalanced pushchair over.
'Be careful what you are doing with that thing. You almost tripped me up.'
Claire was astonished that the woman could be so rude and on regaining her composure and securing her hold on the pushchair she looked up to retaliate.
'It's Sue isn't it?'
'Mrs Williamson. Do I know you?'
Gesturing towards the pushchair Claire replied, 'I'm Livie's nanny.'
'Well be more careful where you are going in future or I'll be forced to speak to Simon.' With that Sue flounced off leaving Claire with her mouth gaping open.
As soon as Sue had walked away the door of the library opened.
'I'm so sorry. Can I help you with the pushchair?'
Ruby walked round the front of the pushchair and knelt down.
'Hello Livie, are you coming to visit the books. We have lots of pretty princess books, want to come see?'
Ruby cupped her hands under the pushchair and lifted the front whilst Claire pulled the rear of the pushchair up and through the open door.
'Thank you for your help.'
'You're welcome. It's Claire isn't it?'
'Yes and you are Ruby, Sue's sister?'
'I am, I'm also the librarian here so please let me know if I can help you with anything.'
Ruby showed Claire the children's section, told her what they would need to obtain library cards and then left them to have a browse around. Claire got Livie out of the pushchair and they spent a happy half hour looking through various books before packing up to head back to the park.
'Did you like the library Livie and will you come back to visit me another time?'
'Book,' Livie replied with a beaming smile and that was good enough for Claire and Ruby.
'Claire, I hope you don't mind me asking but I was thinking that perhaps it would be nice if the library held a Children's Hour once a week.'
'I think that would be a marvellous idea.'
'In that case perhaps you would volunteer? It would be a great help if you would agree to read a selected book to the children each week.'
'If you really want me to I'm sure we could sort something out but are you sure you wouldn't prefer to do it yourself?'
'Oh, mmm, no, I'm not very good with children, you would be a much better person for the job.'
'I wouldn't say that, you've been a big hit with Livie today.'
'Really, it would be so much better if you would do the reading.'
'Well, okay if you are certain.'


'Livie we are going to be late, I hope your Daddy isn't waiting for us.' Claire was cursing herself for not remembering to fit Livie's car seat whilst she was having her nap. The seat had been a lot more difficult to fit than any Claire had experienced before so by the time she had gotten a groggy Livie ready and found a way to supervise her whilst struggling with the seat they were late in starting out for Ross. It didn't help that Claire was having trouble following Simon's directions. As she hustled the pushchair along to Simon's office a man stepped in line beside her.
'That looks very like my Livie so you must be Claire?'
Claire stopped in her tracks to stare at the stranger wondering how he knew who she was. He must have recognised the puzzled look on her face.
'I'm Tom, Simon's partner in the business. He told me you were bringing Livie over.' He smiled warmly at Claire hoping to put her at her ease, suddenly realising that pouncing on her like that probably made him seem a little psychopathic. 'Come on, I'll show you to the office.'
Claire decided he probably wasn't a complete mad man and at least she was in a busy street if he was. She started to follow his lead.
'So Simon tells me you lived in Bristol. How are you finding country life, not too quiet I hope?'
'It's exactly what I needed.'
Tom decided not to push that any further. Tom had jokingly asked if she was single and Simon had explained that she was separated from her husband so they had assumed that was why she was so glad to leave Bristol behind.
'A pretty good part of the world to live I think.' Tom replied. 'Here we are.' Tom held the door open for Claire as she wheeled the pushchair in.


Tom had intended to grab a quick sandwich for lunch but something about this woman with her crazy red hair allured him, so when Simon asked if he wanted to join them for lunch he found himself accepting. He watched her as she played with Livie, such a natural with her and Livie clearly adored her already. Tim normally found himself attracted to the polished, blonde with long legs, with her curly red hair, minimal make up and short nails Claire certainly wasn't his usual type. She wasn't skinny but had curves in all the right places and Tom couldn't help but appreciate them. Claire stood up, lifting Livie and the changing bag.
'I'm think this little lady needs changed. I'll be back in a minute.'
As soon as she was out of earshot Simon turned to Tom.
'Quit it.'
'Quit what?'
'Don't come all innocent with me. I saw the way you were looking at her and I know you too well. She's a sweet girl and she seems...vulnerable, she doesn't need you leering over her and plying the charm.'
'Okay, I admit she is attractive but I'll be on best behaviour.'
'You better be, she is great with Livie and I don't want to lose her because of your love them and leave them attitude. Besides she isn't exactly your normal type.'
When Claire returned with Livie she noticed the two men exchange a glance, she didn't know what it meant but it looked loaded.


Before taking Livie home Claire broached the subject of her sister with Simon.
'My sister called this morning and we talked about her coming up for a visit. She would like to bring her daughter with her but I don't think her husband would be able to come up. I wondered if it would be all right if Zoe and Molly spent the night?'
Simon thought it might feel odd to have strangers stay in his home but opening it up to Claire was working out well and he did say he wanted her to feel at home.
'Of course it will be all right if they stay. Livie will enjoy having another little girl to play with, won't you Livie?'
'Play,' Livie replied a smile brightening her face.




'What brings you here?'
'That's some way to give an old friend a warm welcome.'
'I'm just surprised to see you is all, its not often you call round these days.'
'I just wanted to discuss these drawings with you for the Williams place.'
Simon shouted upstairs, Claire are you okay to finish bathing Livie on your own.'
A muffled affirmation was heard from upstairs. Simon gestured towards the kitchen but Tom lingered at the bottom of the stairs for a moment, thinking about the woman with the red hair that he had secretly hoped to see.


Claire bathed Livie and got her all wrapped up for bedtime before taking her downstairs to say goodnight to her Dad. After tucking live into her Grobag and settling her down for the night she decided to go back downstairs. Her appetite had been increasing a lot and her stomach was gurgling again, a snack and cup of tea were called for. Simon and Tom were still huddled over some plans in the kitchen so Claire thought she would make herself something and head up to her room. As she filled the kettle Tom spoke up.
'I'd love one too please, saying as Simon hasn't bothered to offer me one.'
Simon looked up from his glass of wine, 'sorry, I knew you were driving so couldn't have a glass of wine, never thought of the tea. Think we've gone over this enough for one night.'
'I'll make a tea and bring it in to the lounge if you like?' Claire offered.
'I was only teasing, I'm not that much of a chauvinist. Why don't I make you one and you go sit down.' Claire was taken aback by Tom's offer but before she could reply Simon pitched in.
'Better still have a glass of wine. Livie's tucked up for the night.'
'Umm, no thanks, I better not. I'm meeting up with Mandy tomorrow morning and I don't fancy a hang over and lots of kids running round.'
'One glass won't do you any harm.'
'No thanks. I'm not much of a drinker anyway, virtually tea total.'
'Tea it is then. Come on Claire lets go to the other room and leave Tom to look after us.'
A few minutes later Tom entered the lounge with a tray filled with two cups of tea, milk in a jug and three large slabs of cake. 'Hope you don't mind me helping myself Simon?'
'Not when you bring nice surprises like this.'
Claire was embarrassed at just how greedily her stomach gurgled at the sight of the cake but Tom just laughed and passed her a piece.
'You should come over next weekend Tom, Claire's sister is staying over with her daughter and I'm going to be outnumbered four to one. Could do with another male around the place.'
Tom found himself very pleased at the welcome excuse to spend more time in Claire's company and readily agreed.
  

Claire tried sucking in her stomach and heaving at the zip again. It was no good, the jeans were definitely not going to fit. Looking in the mirror she ran her hand over her stomach, the ever growing swell of it very clear now. She was glad of the late autumn cold weather and the ability to wear baggy clothing but she wasn't going to be able to hide her secret for much longer. Claire had been trying so hard to ignore her abdomen, not able to face what now lay in front of her. When they had tried for this baby, she and Nick were so confident of the future they had planned together as a family. That had all changed the day he died. Claire found a looser pair of combats and quickly covered herself up. She would hide her secret as long as she could; she told herself it was because she didn't want to loose her job, couldn't find a way to tell Simon she was pregnant, especially after what he had been through, but would that have stopped her from making a doctor's appointment or attending the scan she knew she should have had by now.