April fools blunder - Great Writing Creative Writing Community

Quicklinks:

Great Writing - Home > Comedy > April fools blunder

READING ROOM

Great Writing - Home

Read and review others' work

Articles on writing

Advice from the community

COMMUNITY

Talk to others in the forums

Events and Competitions

GW News

ABOUT GREAT WRITING

All About Us

WORK AWAITING REVIEW
This list is randomly generated from all our published works. Mama Uses Daddy's Gold C... by Cherry26 Restoring Joshua by arablethecrocket The Blair Snitch Project by andybyers First time drinker by JohnFHamill Love, Honour, and Betray by russ11 We need something. Anyt... by pulltheletter Man or Minstrel by audrie Apple by uche The Bedwetter by Talisker The World Tiddlywinks Cu... by woody44

GW IS...
Great Writing creative writing community is designed to prompt ideas and provide inspiration and motivation within aspiring and amateur authors. Whatever your topic; from love poetry to Doctor Who or Harry Potter fan fiction, Great Writing's online writing group is where you can make new friends and improve your creative writing.

WHO'S ONLINE
We have 962 guests online and 1 member online Canadian_Bacon

Comedy


print friendly version
April fools blunder

By brook_rivers

25 March 2006

used bagheeras idea of a news tag here & exaggerated a current situation.

A family, of an elderly couple and a middle aged couple, are sat watching the news on April 1^st.

News Reader: And the last item tonight is the uproar caused by the government’s announcement to reclaim the money mistakenly given to pensioners. The government claimed that they had made a mistake in the calculations and desperately needed to re-collect the money in order to run the country efficiently. If all the money is not collected then all pensions will be stopped until the loss is made up.
Let’s go over to Peter Oliver who is at the rioting scenes in Manchester at the moment.

Peter.

(Pause)

Peter can you hear me?

[violent scenes are in motion behind Peter, angry pensioners are brandishing walking sticks, setting guide dogs on passers by and generally making lots of noise and nuisance whilst waving their banners, which have very rude things about the government written on them]

Peter: yes; sorry it is slightly hard to hear with all this background noise, but from these scenes it is fairly obvious what the pensioners in Manchester think of this appalling decision. Either way thousands of pensioners all over the country are going to be effected by this astounding decision. Many will be left without any income or support from the government.

This is one of the pensioners involved in today’s protest, (indicates to a slightly dishevelled and wild looking old woman) let’s hear her view of the events –

Old woman: well, we are all of us uniting together to go against this ridiculous bloody decision. How can a government make a mistake like this anyway, and then make the elderly suffer for there stupidity? Everyone I know has spent the money, and rightly so, it was much needed. We don’t get enough support as it is, some of our husbands have fought for king and country and how are they repaid. Like this!
[Getting more angry, waving her walking stick about]If this isn’t sorted out soon the government are going to have a problem, we are already in talks of a take over……….

Peter: O.k, best stop there but you get the idea what kind of atmosphere and attitude is prevailing here in Manchester. Back to the studio.

The elderly couple watching the TV look at each other and start howling with laughter.
The middle age couple look at each other as if to say the world’s gone mad.

Woman: [as if talking to a child] Mother, why do you find this funny, it’s a serious issue and it affects you!

Elderly woman still chuckling: oh it was a good one eh? [Turning to her husband]

Elderly man: [replies] most certainly! Beats last years! They’ve come up trumps with this one!

Man: what are you talking about? Were you watching the same thing as us?

Elderly man: well it certainly got them two didn’t it?

[middle age couple look exasperated]

Elderly man: don’t be so gullible you two! What day is it? First of April isn’t it you daft things!

[Pause]

April fools! The news readers sometimes do a bit of a joke piece at the end of the news don’t they? [chuckles]

Didn’t think you’d be taken in by that one it’s ridiculous!

Woman: But dad, this isn’t an April fools. Look iv got two of today’s papers here, its all over, we were going to discuss it with you tonight. This isn’t a joke! It’s completely true!

[Elderly couple look at each other in doubt. Look back at their daughter as if waiting for her to jump up and yell ‘April Fools’. It doesn’t happen and their faces drop as they look back at the protests still flickering on the screen. Both of them now look as though they are about to start ranting like just about every other pensioner in the country]

Reviews

Hi, Brook-shields!
Written by Bagheera (685 comments posted) 25th March 2006

There are many ways of using an idea, yours is as good as anyone else's - and nothing the present Government tries would surprise me any more! :grin

Too true
Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3590 comments posted) 26th March 2006

I'm afraid with our Tony and his bunch of paranoid jokers every day is april fools day. Sometimes you think the guy has got to be kidding but no it's for real.Like your pensioners we either laugh or get angry. Let's just hope you did exaggerate the situation and it doesn't turn out to be true!!

Written by amboline (183 comments posted) 27th March 2006

A very good spin on a familiar idea, certainly. I wasn't sure whether this belonged more in "Scripts" (or even "Comedy") than it did in "Short Stories", you've certainly written it more like a short play than a story as such. But the whole thing is very effective.

If I were reading this as a short story, rather than a sketch, I might be concerned that the ending isn't subtle enough. You've gone for the "sledgehammer" option which is probably appropriate for a staged sketch, particularly one with an overt political message that's sure to get people laughing. In a short story, it can actually be more effective (imho) not to state the obvious - but to do it all by inference and implication. So, for instance:

"...Didn’t think you’d be taken in by that one it’s ridiculous!"

"Er, Dad... I think perhaps you'd better look at the paper..."

(ENDS)

But this certainly shows great use of classic material, and an impeccable sense of timing, in every sense.

thanks for the comments
Written by brook_rivers (486 comments posted) 27th March 2006

thnaks for the comments. I think bottleblonde sumed up what the piece was about nicely in her review!
To amboline, as i said i wasn't sure where to put it, i wasn't sure if it would be strong enough for the comedy section but as you say it is clearly more of a sketch then a story so i may actually move it now on your suggestion!

& thanks for your last comment it really made my day!

'But this certainly shows great use of classic material, and an impeccable sense of timing, in every sense'

Comments..
Written by givitsum (651 comments posted) 31st March 2006

I would like to comment on this but I am on strike.

bad to worse
Written by sasquatch (125 comments posted) 2nd April 2006

i too am waiting for advice from my union official before taking any further action.

in the meantime i would suggest listening to borats 'chair' joke for a lesson in how a real joke should be structured.

http://www.devilducky.com/media/18424/

Written by brook_rivers (486 comments posted) 3rd April 2006

well you can't please everyone!!

I will take your advice on board sasquatch, after all from the state of some of your reviews you must be an expert on how to recover after falling flat! :grin

Too Vulgar
Written by gwynn1970 (109 comments posted) 3rd April 2006

I think the basis is there but its a little bit too vulgar for my taste. Too much detail. You could have just said Fred West stood watching, you didn't need to say he was masturbating.

gwynn

purest green
Written by sasquatch (125 comments posted) 7th April 2006

Good one Brook.

Upon further reading of this piece i have realised there are in fact some soaring comedic highlights.

Your use of the word [Pause] for example, it really stands out. Why dont you try developing it?

Only registered users can rate and write comments.
Please login or register.

Previous item		Next item