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Poetry
The silly young sailor!
By JD
15 April 2006
i wrote this in a minute of madness one day!
it makes me smile though

Once there was a silly young sailor

Thus a good old sailor man was he

Always a search through his telescope

As his ship sailed endlessly over the sea

 
This silly sailor travelled all the oceans

Flogged through mountains of eternal rain

Searching for his passion of destiny

A future for him, so said for him to claim

 
This seaman searched ashore in every country

With knee bent legs he had walked

His beard had grown now to his ankles

Surviving solely on the fish he had caught

 
He circled the world many times in disbelief

Loosing one eye to a patch, the other a squint

Now where and what was his destiny

As he’d spent a life in search of it

 
The now wise older sailor soon realised

It is no matter to where you roam

Your destiny awaiting is yours to be figured

So hence, he should have stayed at home…………………………………………

 
JD

Reviews

Written by Bagheera (685 comments posted) 14th April 2006
Okay, for me the rhythm "staggers" a bit unevenly from time to time BUT, that's just a personal preference thing! :grin  
 
The 'message' is, I guess, the one contained in the final line (and no worse for having been used before! :grin
 
"There's snow place like Gnome" ...... :p

Written by JD (12 comments posted) 15th April 2006
Thanks Bagheera for the review 
i have yet to read some of your work but i will have a look in a minute 
the reason why it staggers is because i wanted it that way, as you know it is always easier when reading your own work as you know exactly how to say the words to place them correctly 
sometimes i think it reflects on the mood i am in! ha Ha 
thanks again 
JD

Written by JD (12 comments posted) 15th April 2006
Thanks Bagheera for the review 
i have yet to read some of your work but i will have a look in a minute 
the reason why it staggers is because i wanted it that way, as you know it is always easier when reading your own work as you know exactly how to say the words to place them correctly 
sometimes i think it reflects on the mood i am in! ha Ha 
thanks again 
JD
actually .......... !
Written by Bagheera (685 comments posted) 15th April 2006
 
............ considering the reputation sailors have for liquor, I guess that "staggering gait" is in many ways highly appropriate (but I only thought of that after I'd hit the "submit" button :upset )

Written by JD (12 comments posted) 15th April 2006
H Ha, thanks for making me laugh 
JD :grin

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