Princess - Great Writing Creative Writing Community

Quicklinks:

Great Writing - Home > Poetry > Princess

READING ROOM

Great Writing - Home

Read and review others' work

Articles on writing

Advice from the community

COMMUNITY

Talk to others in the forums

Events and Competitions

GW News

ABOUT GREAT WRITING

All About Us

WORK AWAITING REVIEW
This list is randomly generated from all our published works. Bed bugs bite by meadowcroft1964 The Glasgow West End Ant... by roswell1211 Harry , Jess and Pete... by patterjack Dee's Prayer by mia_ms_kim Two Dreams by Talisker The Kitchen Men by jean.day Midge by tomjsturner Door number 1 by Snodlander Health & Safety at Work ... by idlemusings Escape - revisited by idlemusings

GW IS...
Great Writing creative writing community is designed to prompt ideas and provide inspiration and motivation within aspiring and amateur authors. Whatever your topic; from love poetry to Doctor Who or Harry Potter fan fiction, Great Writing's online writing group is where you can make new friends and improve your creative writing.

WHO'S ONLINE
We have 1534 guests online and 1 member online fellpony bluecity

WHO'S ONLINE

fellpony

bluecity

Poetry


print friendly version
Princess

By JD

15 April 2006

I wrote this for my daughter as she gave me a title to work with

Close ones eyes and imagine a dress
Only to be worn by the most exquisite princess
Lavished in trimmings, overflowing in frills
Begins at your shoulders and ends at your heels
Buttercups escort daises so expertly sewn
The splendour of lemon such a wonderful tone
Fringed and speckled with the smallest of pearls
A gown to be worn for the greatest of twirls
‘Oh’ what a dream to wear such a dress
tailor made only, may I add for the most exquisite princess…………..

laying accurately cushioned and perfectly round
beaming with glory a magnificent crown
sapphires join rubies flashing in row
there’s shimmering of silver and splashes of gold
dainty yet spellbound so masterly made
dappled with topaz and whispers of jade
the focus extravagant, an imperial diamond
seen sparkling spectacular all over the kingdom
‘Oh’ what a crown, sure to impress
artistry made only, may I add for the most exquisite princess…………..

Now flaming in radiance, bedazzling glitter
The finale to all attire, a glorious slipper
Beautified with reflection, flawless sequins
Swirling silk ribbon to the ankles embracing
A shoemaker of dexterity, a true connoisseur
The lining luxurious and clear crystal of colour
With petite opal buttons waylaying to catch
For wee ballerinas achieving the grandest pirouette
‘Oh’ to be dancing a slipper to test
Hand made only, may I add, for the most exquisite princess………………..

JD

Reviews

Written by Nance (86 comments posted) 15th April 2006

Hi, so in my view, you've got a considerable stock of knowledge about clothes, to be honest, I wouldn't be able to write a work on this very matter. And I want to add, that you have plenty of imagination, it's seen from every line. It's really nice as for me.

Written by JD (12 comments posted) 15th April 2006

thanks for the review Nance
when i am writing this kind of poem i think of things that my daughter would like, so it makes it easier for me
speak soon
JD

Written by amboline (183 comments posted) 18th April 2006

Of the poems of yours that I've seen so far, this is the one that appealed the most. There's a real brightness to it and a tongue-in-cheek humour as well. Apart from your last lines of each verse, which are deliberately long (and quite effective), there are a few places where the rhythm stutters within the verses - "the focus extravagant, an imperial diamond" and "A shoemaker of dexterity, a true connoisseur" for instance - which will be obvious when the poem is read out loud. Keeping the rhythm (or playing with it in a consistent manner) is almost more important than keeping the rhyme scheme in a piece like this. Apart from these places, though, the whole piece flows nicely and it's great fun.

I did end up thinking that you must have a particularly intelligent daughter though! I'm not sure how well words like "extravagant", "dexterity" and "connoisseur" would work with the average 11-year-old; in places, the language you've used is almost too sophisticated for the subject matter of the poem. Perhaps Josie or another of our children's poets would like to advise here?

Written by JD (12 comments posted) 20th April 2006

Hi Amboline,
firstly i would like to thank you for taking the time to read my work.
As i have stated before i have always wrote my poetry for my children and i alone, at the time of writing there was never a thought for anybody else to read them, we have had great fun writing and reading amongst us, i always like to use words that my children have yet to learn, we always go through the poem and i explain anything that they need to know, therefore we have a little English lesson whilst having fun.
once again thank you
JD

Only registered users can rate and write comments.
Please login or register.

Previous item		Next item