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Comedy
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| Innovation in the Service Industry | |
| By Bottleblondesurfer | ||||||||||||||||||||||
| 26 April 2006 | ||||||||||||||||||||||
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This was inspired by Givitsum's recent post offering innovation in the service industry. This is my take on the subject, done in the form of a flyer, suppose this came through your door... (this isn't how I wanted it too look, it kept changing when I posted it up) CONGRATULATIONS! You have been chosen to be offered a new and radical product. We are a fresh and exiting company with an innovative slant on an old idea Yes !! You too can have one of the trappings of a successful person. Do you feel people are ignoring you, not recognizing you? Are being taken for granted? We have the answer, our product can lend you an air of mystery and importance. People will think you must matter, be a person who counts. We can give you your own personal stalker. We at Stalkers R’ us can arrange for you to be stalked at your own convenience. Just think of the cache it will bring to you. We can offer you a free trial period. The trial should last about 3 weeks, depending on the judge. (just a little stalkers joke) We have long realized that stalking has been a preserve of the rich and famous but we are adopting a new liberal policy which would include the unimportant, the mediocre and the non entities and give them the ultimate celebrity experience And you will be delighted to know yours was one of the names that came up. JUST THINK!! … how your status will rise when you have to complain about all the precautions you must now take and how your life has been changed.. YES! .. this could be happening to you, you’re just a phone call away. Although not famous you do fit our profile in many ways and (if the covert photos we have taken are accurate), quite present able, which always helps. Our operatives always find it easier to obsess over attractive people. We do have comprehensive medical insurance cover just in case your stalker gets a bit too enthusiastic. And to further put your mind at rest our number of fatalities has fallen to a negligible level. NOW... I’m sure you will want to take advantage of this service so in anticipation of this we have tapped your phone. All you have to do is pick it up and say, “Yes please!” You don’t even have to give us your details we have most of them already, though if you want to tell us what you are wearing we will happily listen -- Heavy breathing an optional extra-- In the meantime you can practice looking harassed. You’re in good hands, our motto is We know how you think We know who you are We know where you live.
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