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Poetry
Payment Deferred
By patterjack
07 May 2006
A slush piece .

An exercise in iambic pentameter with some enjambment

One iamb replaced by an anapaest


Payment Deferred

The moon swings high, a golden penny tossed
by careless boys in careless games of chance.
They leave it there without a second glance
and to poor lovers never count the cost.

I’ll reach for it. The price of dreams is high,
but hope of paying grows with the growing gold
to buy new dreams , replacing those of old.
So let me take my coin down from the sky.

Reviews

Written by brook_rivers (484 comments posted) 7th May 2006
Excellent! I liked the idea of having the rhyming couplets in the middle, might have a try at that myself! Some great imagery in there too. 'let me take my coin down from the sky'.

Written by laya08 (10 comments posted) 6th June 2006
Nice, expression good. Loved it I guess you could say

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